You Dummy: Foolish Scientist Implants Chip In Hand, Can Now Contract Computer Viruses

May 26, 2010


Seen here demonstrating how to properly milk a bull, Dr. Mark Gasson implanted a computer chip in his hand to raise awareness about just how little it takes to call yourself a scientist these days. God, there used to be standards. Gimme that lab coat!

It allows him to open special doors and even keeps his cellphone locked down so only he can use it. What else does it let him do? Well, contract a virus only meant for computers.

So, what could happen? Well, that really depends on how complex an implant is, and how wired it is to your body. A pacemaker could be shut off remotely, for instance, or -- as an example provided by Gasson -- more complex devices that interface directly with the heart or the brain could have serious implications if compromised.

That's, uh, that's f***ing scary. Computer hackers: assassins of the future. But seriously, I'm totally gonna infect your system and make you evacuate your bowels on first dates because I want you to find true love.

Hit the jump for a video of the WHY DO YOU HAVE A DALEK IN YOUR SCIENCE LAB?!

First human 'infected with computer virus' [bbcnews]
Brave scientist becomes first person 'infected with computer virus' [dvice]

Thanks to Spartacus, Struvs and Aaron, who both implanted barbecue chips in their hands.

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