Who Buys Booze For The Bottle?: Medea Vodka Features Programmable LED Sign

April 13, 2010


I don't want a fancy bottle, that only drives the price of the booze up. I'm fine with plastic. As a matter of fact, one time I bought a gallon of moonshine at a gas station in Virginia that came in a re-capped milk jug. It tasted like Satan's urine but got me so crunk my vision was blurry for two straight days -- and three gay ones.

From the 18th century comes a flawless vodka imported from Schiedam, Holland--the world's first center of distillation excellence. For seven generations, our distillery has used the finest whole grain wheat to perfect the time-honored process of single batch distillation. Distilled slowly, in small batches using natural artesian water, the result is a subtle, flawless vodka.

From the 21st century comes a technology that satisfies the need for self-expression and personalization in the digital age. As the fine spirit loosens your tongue, the world's first interactive bottle unleashes your inner poet, your inner philosopher, your inner flirt. It's a rare blend of the best of both eras.

*cough* Gimmick *cough*. I've got news for you: if you're "unleashing your inner poet/philosopher/flirt" via LED-lit vodka bottle you're doing it horribly, horribly wrong. Now philosophize on this for a minute: I'd rather buy a bottle of bathtub booze made with fermented fart bubbles than a bottle of this stuff. Okay, not really. BUT ONLY BECAUSE I'M ALLERGIC TO BATH BEADS.

Product Site

Thanks to nicobrown84, Googiyo and Yes I'm A Superhero You Just Can't Tell, who don't buy booze in novelty bottles, they buy novelty bottles in booze. Wait, what? I'm confused.

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