Note: Video of all the suckage is after the jump.
This is a little compilation video of all the failures-at-life in commercials who can't manage to do anything right without a new product. God I hate them. You know how many times the neighbors have called the cops because I've been screaming at these people through the television? Zero -- I cut all their phone lines digging a swimming pool.
Whenever a TV product commercial plays I bust a gut during the parts where they show us what we're doing wrong and why we need the product.
This is my tribute to the hilarious work the actors in these infomercials do.
Products in this video include (in alphabetical order)
Awesome Auger, Big City Slider, Big Top Cupcake, Bottle Tops, Bumpits, Buxton Palm Wallet, Cami Secret, Covermate, Crazy Critters, CrazyBraid, DepilSilk, Doggy Step, Egg Genie, Emery Cat, EZ Cracker, Grip N Twist, Dual Pro Peeler and Adjust-A-Slice, Handy Groomer spot, ISPEX, JML Exakt Saw, JML Keep Fresh Bags, JML Paint Sprayer Pro, JML Table Mate Dub, JumpSnap the Ropeless Jump Rope, Magic Tap, mighty mend it, Naptastic, Pedi Pistol - Home Pedicure Systems by Ped Egg, PediPaws, Perfect Brownie, Perfect Button, Perfect Patty, Perfect Shelf, Pet Cozy, Robostir, Shoe Dini, Shoes Under, Smart Spin, Snuggie, Spill Daddy Paint Pro, SteamBuddy, Tushee, Tiddy Bear, Tool Band, TurboSlice, Twin Draft Guard, Twist n Style, UGLU, UGO Bags, Urine Gone, Vidalia Slice Wizard, Zipits
Wow, I can honestly say I'm proud to only own eight of the products listed. And the only reason I have those is because sometimes I stay up late at night and drunk dial. Hesllo, Julie? I Wanan talk to JOLIE, PUT JILLIE ON THE PHLONE! *sobbing* WHy? WHY'd YOU LEaVES ME JULES? Isit causeof my drinkling? Cause IAM SLOBER NOW. HellO? Dual Pro Peeler? I'll take two.
Hit it for the fail-filled video.
Thanks to Richard, who has never called in the next half hour to take advantage of additional savings.