A gorilla at the Calgary Zoo picked up a knife left by one of its keepers and threatened to stab another primate if it didn't reveal the whereabouts of its banana horde. Okay, not really. But it did swing the knife around menacingly. I lie. BITCH I'LL CUT YOU!
"He grabbed the knife exactly in the correct position and he smelled it and looked at it," said Calgarian Joe Scheffler, who was at the zoo with his wife, Heike. "A few seconds later, another gorilla came and he was very interested.
"He tried to get the knife, but the gorilla with the knife lifted the knife for his buddy . . . it seems to me that the gorilla with the knife was a little bit angry and he lifted his hand with the knife.
"It was just (like) a scene from a crime," added Scheffler, whose wife snapped photos of the incident.
Suddenly, as though it sensed danger, Scheffler said the second gorilla stepped away and the knife-wielding gorilla walked a short distance and placed it on an old chair in the exhibit.
Oh man, animals with weapons. This reminds me of the future!
Gorilla caught holding knife at Calgary Zoo [calgaryherald]
Thanks to Jeremy, who once brought a lightsaber to a knife fight but was disqualified for cheating.