You're A Real Ninja Now: The Belt Sword

March 9, 2009

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The Belt Sword is a questionable sword hidden within a belt. It was created to make dorks feel safe even though in a real-life situation they'd either forget they were wearing the thing or stab themselves trying to get it out. Also, they look suspiciously like aluminum-foil wrapped cardboard. The belt with 24" and 27" swords costs $150. $210 if you want five swords (24", 27", 29", 31", and 33"). Sorry folks, but I'm not interested. No, unlatching my buckle releases another, much more powerful weapon. Obviously, I'm talking about a flying dragon. *unbuckling* KA-P....uh-oh. Looks like the proverbial chicken has flown the coop. And, oh God -- taken off with the eggs.

Hit the jump to see more of this chick, along with a picture of the system and links to the product page and video demonstrations.

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Product Site
Product Videos (NOTE: slightly NSFW, autoplays that woman from the first shot whipping the sword out)

Thanks to Spikey DaPikey, who once stabbed a man to death with his own flip-flop.

  • Harshit Gupta

    You should always carry the best and durable sword belts which is used to carry your authentic military swords.

  • Curtis Koehler

    The BeltSword, RazorSword, RazorDagger, Double RazorDagger, and RazorBaton are a series of weapon systems that were designed for the purpose of concealing weapons that were either impossible to conceal or not practical to conceal. (For undercover work we can hide a 6” to 8” RazorDagger under a small woman’s bikini) Most weapon systems were designed and patented with the help of other experts in law enforcement,
    military, and martial arts professionals.

    There are strict design qualifications; they must be totally hidden, lethal, easy to access, and capable of sub-second deployment under stress. Some RazorSwords are designed to be very light and would not make for a good thrusting weapon. To be effective it is recommended you sharpen the lightweight RazorSwords. The heavyweight RazorSwords are a formidable weapon, and are capable of crushing concrete blocks, and thrusting through a human torso. Please go to for a video demonstration.

    Our weapon systems are not designed to look pretty; their beauty is in their “invisibility”, and ability to neutralize an enemy target, before the target can begin to react to the termination.

    Very respectfully, Curtis W. Koehler CEO (Chief Edged Officer)

    P.S. The above videos were created for fun and entertainment value, and to demonstrate how a 20-year old dancer to an 85 year-old woman could easily use the BeltSword.

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