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Japanese Robot Turns Snow Into Bricks Of Ice


Note: Article was originally posted January 3, 2008, but because the internet is cyclical the story is going around again so I edited it and moved it to the front page.

Seen here looking suspiciously like Jake from Adventure Time in tank form, Yuki-taro is a Japanese robot that drives down the street sucking in snow and packing it into bricks of ice that he stacks on a shelf behind him. He's loaded with two video cameras and a GPS tracking system to help ensure he doesn't make ice blocks out of any of the homeless that may be sleeping in the snowbank he's working on. No word on what the Japanese use the ice blocks for, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say for a sweet ice-domino maze. Also, this was on Fox News with the title 'Robot Eats Snow, Poops Out Bricks of Ice'. "Poops out" -- really? No serious news organization should ever use the phrase "Poops out" in a headline. Leave that to Geekologie. Next on Fox News: 'Man Scarfs Down World's Largest Pizza, Blows Chunks But Still Manages To Take Record-Breaking Crapola.' Wow, okay, that's an amazing headline.

A big thanks to Brytne, who gets two thumbs up, for the tip. (Wait -- that's how I used to write shoutouts?!)

Quadcopter With Fireworks Attached Shooting Some Guy


This is a video of a quadrocopter with two Roman candles attached shooting at some guy wearing a crash helmet. He gets hit several times. He also screams like a sissy. Seriously? They're just Roman candles -- how many times have you ever heard of somebody getting hurt by a Roman candle? We used to shoot them at each other wearing nothing but swim goggles and nobody ever got hurt. "Then what happened to your finger?" M-80's are a whole different story. I've seen one take a buttcheek clean off before. "Yours?" Thank goodness not.

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'Fantastic Four' Trailer: The Thing Goes Commando This Time


The first Fantastic Four trailer is here, and director Josh Trank can at last show everyone that he didn't just make Chronicle again. At least not quite. Though he's once again working in the realm of Michael B. Jordan & Friends being stricken with magic space powers, this time it seems he's dropped the handheld, found-footage schtick in favor of something a lot more like Interstellar: a somber focus on human exploration doom-n-gloom and spacesuits that look just futuristic enough that you sort of buy it. But now also with a naked man covered in stones. In the non-Marvel post-Dark Knight era, clobberin' time has become a time for self-serious, nude reflection, apparently.

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Space Walk: High Heels That Look Like Meteorites


These are the Meteorite shoes created by Studio Swine for Microsoft (presumably for an ad, but possibly because Bill Gates has a meteor fetish). They 3-D scanned real meteorites from the Museum of Natural History, then used a milling machine to carve the shoes' outers from aluminum foam. The results are out of this world. Just kidding, the results are totally OF this world because a meteorite isn't a meteorite until it survives entry into earth's atmosphere. If they were out of this world they would be METEOROID shoes. Just a little astronomy lesson for you. Also, my penis is an event horizon.

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Clogged Arteries Are The Best Arteries: KFC's Chicken-For-A-Bun Hotdog


This is KFC's Double Down Dog, a hotdog with a fried chicken for a bun and drizzled with a cheese sauce that looks like mustard. Obviously, they blew it by not adding chili and diced onions. I would still eat one. Unfortunately, they've only been introduced to South Korea and the Philippines so far, with select restaurants only making 50 a day. That is not nearly enough. Not even for me. You know how many hotdogs I've eaten in a day before? Guess. "Ten?" Six. "Then why wouldn't 50 be enough?" Because I have friends. "Good one." Fine, because I like to pretend I have friends.

Thanks to lilco, who agrees the best hotdogs are my armpits because they smell like chili-cheese dogs with extra onions if I don't shower for a day.

Wow, Not How I Wanna Go: How The Speckled Orb Weaver Spider Kills Its Prey


Retroactive warning: spider.

This is a speckled orb weaver spider. It doesn't immobilize and kill its prey with poisonous fangs like some other spiders. Instead, it begins wrapping its victims in silk (a single moth can get wrapped in up to 460-feet), first to break its wings and legs so it can't get away, then to squeeze its head so tight its eyeballs get forced back into its head cavity. That's when it dies. Me? Thanks to the gypsy fortune-teller I visited at the county fair in 1994, I already know how I die. "And?" It's not that impressive. "Well?" iPad in the bathtub. "I'm not sure that would kill you." Well it will if you're reaching for it on the back of the toilet and slip and hit your head and drown." Besides, it's gotta be true because iPads didn't even exist in '94. It's fine, the woman saw the future, I've accepted it. Although I have sold my iPad on eBay and started bathing with a crash helmet on.

Thanks to my friend Becca B, who knows I love spiders almost as much as I love pretending to love spiders.

Will It Blend?: Neodymium Magnets (aka Buckyballs)


This is a video of Tom the Blendtec guy blending a bunch of Buckyball neodymium magnets (which were recently banned by the Consumer Product Safety Commission because apparently parents couldn't manage to keep them out of their children's mouths). Did they blend? I think so. They kind of shot sparks for awhile then turned into a lump of coal. Regardless, who cares if they can blend, I just want to know if they can microwave.

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Oh Baby, You: Muppets Perform Biz Markie's 'Just A Friend'


This is a bunch of Muppets footage edited by Youtuber isthishowyougoviral to appear that Rowlf the Dog is singing Biz Markie's iconic 'Just A Friend' to Miss Piggy (previously: the Beastie Boys' 'So Watcha Want' and Naughty By Nature's 'Hip Hop Hooray'). Really, Miss Piggy -- Kermit is just a friend? Then how do you explain THIS PHOTO?! "You took a picture up the leg of your athletic shorts?" Wrong photo, wrong photo.

Keep going for the video, plus BONUS Biz Markie's original music video for the song.

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