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Results for "yeah you are"

  • March 12, 2014
    According to a recent post in The New York Times, monocles are coming back in fashion thanks to hipsters who want to differentiate themselves from the far-too-mainstream-glasses-wearing-hipsters. When reached for comment, Mr. Peanut had this to say, "I'm a f***ing peanut and I... / Continue →
  • February 24, 2014
    Meet Blondie Bennett (she legally changed her name), a woman who has taken her obsession with becoming a real life Barbie doll to the point she's undergoing hypnotherapy sessions to lower her IQ. Wait -- whoever said Barbie was stupid? And I don't remember her tits being that... / Continue →
  • September 12, 2013
    Because college has become less of a place to prepare yourself for a realistic future and more of a place to dig yourself into debt for 4+ years, The University of California Irvine is offering an eight week zombie survival course using The Walking Dead as its basis. Obviously... / Continue →
  • September 6, 2013
    Meet Blair McMillan. Blair McMillan is a man. A man with a sick mustache and mullet and the dream to become a real life Kenny Powers torture his family for the next year by only living with technology from 1986 or earlier. Shhhhhhh -- you hear that? That's the sound of a pr... / Continue →
  • August 27, 2013
    Because rich people are running out of things to spend their money on, a company in Japan is offering a toilet-paper-of-the-month style subscription service that delivers $13/roll ass paper to your door every month. I think we can all agree when I say thank goodness there's no... / Continue →
  • August 27, 2013
    Because NASA is getting out of the launching people into space business, the agency has announced it's auctioning off three of its previously used shuttle launchpads. And you and I are going to buy one and turn it into a space themed restaurant. And by restaurant I obviously ... / Continue →
  • July 31, 2013
    Because in Japan there's no such thing as going too far, for around ¥10,000 (~$1,000) Shonan Beauty Clinic plastic surgeon Takaaki Matsuoka will burn better palm reading creases into your hand with an electric scalpel. Cool, I want my sex line extended all the way around the b... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2013
    This is the $65 WorkEZ Executive laptop desk. WorkEZ, really? People are still naming shit like that? It can function as a traditional laptop mount, a TV dinner style stand, AND EVEN BE USED UPSIDE DOWN. I can't imagine typing upside down being comfortable though. No, I'm ... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2013
    The last time we checked in with Australian billionaire Clive Palmer his dinosaur park sounded like a pipe dream (albeit the sexiest pipe dream), but now the regional council has voted and the park is currently under construction. Unfortunately, there was no mention of the act... / Continue →
  • April 18, 2013
    In news that won't excite anyone and will probably make me look like an ass-hat for even posting it (I'm having a great self-esteem day), Budweiser is going to release new 'bowtie' shaped cans of its famous alcoholic water starting next month. I'm gonna buy some, save them for... / Continue →
  • April 3, 2013
    In heartbreaking news, Disney is shutting down video game developer/publisher LucasArts after its acquisition of it and LucasFilm last year. The company was known for some of the best graphic adventure games the world has even seen, including: Maniac Mansion, Loom, Day of the ... / Continue →
  • January 15, 2013
    The Vaportini is a $35 device used to vaporize alcohol, after which it can be inhaled into the lungs and the effects of intoxication felt much more quickly than traditional oral or buttchugging methods. Obviously, lawmakers are terrified a bunch of kids are going to inhale the... / Continue →
  • October 15, 2012
    So apparently the Ukrainian navy is training dolphins for combat by attaching guns and knives to their heads to attack enemies. Wait -- the Ukraine has a navy? The program reportedly includes training dolphins to search for mines and marking them with buoys. But Ukraine also ... / Continue →
  • September 24, 2012
    Everybody needs a hobby, and for some people that hobby is extreme unicycling. Different strokes for different folks, you know? I juggle chainsaws. No I don't. I play video games and drink. I used to roller skate around the neighborhood during the day in a helmet and booty... / Continue →
  • April 23, 2012
    The world's largest McDonald's restaurant is being for the London Olympics this summer, with a seating capacity of over 1,500. No word if McDonald's thought 'build the largest restaurant' was going to be a medal event this year. With 1,500 seats and spanning about half the le... / Continue →
  • February 17, 2012
    Because frat bros will buy anything, Latrobe Brewing Company of Pennsylvania is now manufacturing and selling Pong brand beer, canned beer made specifically for playing beer pong (read: watery and tasteless). Me? I play beer pong like a REAL MAN. With no shirt and pounding m... / Continue →
  • January 26, 2012
    Newt Gingrich, speaking recently to a heavily NASA-populated crowd in Cocoa, Florida, promised a permanent US moonbase by 2020 if elected president. Like all politicians, he is a dirty, filthy liar. Gingrich, the former speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives who is ca... / Continue →
  • December 30, 2011
    That sad old pervert (Dennis Hof) who owns the Moonlight BunnyRanch brothel in Nevada has decided to open a new alien themed whorehouse because his regular prosties aren't doing it for him anymore. "They need to be green and wearing those glitter antennas", I imagine he said t... / Continue →
  • October 12, 2011
    Because Japan is literally millennia ahead in the realm of WTF'ery, dentists in the country are now offering 'Yaeba' cosmetic treatments, a dental procedure that makes a girl's teeth appear wonky and (obviously) more desirable. But how do they feel about lazy eyes? Yaeba mean... / Continue →
  • September 26, 2011
    But if that's the passenger's hand with that camera, then... Sorry kids, but if you were hoping to be the first one to blow part of the Star Wars theme on the bagpipes while riding a unicycle in a kilt, you might as well tell your mommy to cancel the rest of your music lessons... / Continue →