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Results for "viruses"

  • September 13, 2012
    According to security software giant McAfee, Emma Watson is the most dangerous celebrity to search for online, with a one-in-eight chance of landing on a malware site while looking for pictures of her face Photoshopped on some other chick's naked body. My God we need to get yo... / Continue →
  • October 9, 2011
    Because what could be better than a bunch of unmanned flying death machines getting infected with a a computer virus, a bunch of unmanned flying death machines have been infected with a computer virus. *crosses fingers for something terminal* The virus, first reported by Wire... / Continue →
  • August 11, 2011
    Scientists at MIT claim they may have found a way to treat almost any viral infection by developing a drug that causes infected cells to kill themselves. No word if we can broaden the scope of the drug and treat the Kardashians. Human cells have plenty of defenses against vir... / Continue →
  • June 20, 2011
    Can you tell who doesn't belong? SPOILER: The lion, sicko. Apparently "lookist" dating website BeautifulPeople.com was recently hacked, and accepted over 30,000 busted-ass, booboo looking people over the course of six weeks because its rating system was jeopardized. Per compa... / Continue →
  • February 7, 2011
    Seen here looking like an exploding nebula or some such shit, a strain of flu prepares to have its ass whipped and lil' tentacle dealies torn off by a new flu vaccine. That's right folks, scientists at Oxford University believe a vaccine capable of combating EVERY strain of fl... / Continue →
  • December 14, 2010
    Allegedly an HIV-positive German man with leukemia (that's pretty cruel, God) was given a stem-cell transplant from a donor that's HIV resistant, which has left the man HIV-free for four years now. Now I have absolutely no clue how growing weed inside someone could possibly cu... / Continue →
  • December 13, 2010
    [Insert virus joke here] This may or may not be older than the internet itself but it's hard to tell because those words look Russian and I happen to know they still use crappy old computers over there. I've been squinting trying to make out the date of death, which likes '91... / Continue →
  • May 26, 2010
    Seen here demonstrating how to properly milk a bull, Dr. Mark Gasson implanted a computer chip in his hand to raise awareness about just how little it takes to call yourself a scientist these days. God, there used to be standards. Gimme that lab coat! It allows him to open s... / Continue →
  • December 15, 2009
    As part of a campaign promoting Norton Online Backup, Norton is running a contest giving away free bacon-of-the-month memberships simply for lying your ass off and making up a story about losing important computer data. Piece of cake bacon. The rules: 1) You tell us your data... / Continue →
  • November 12, 2009
    This is a super impressive Dr. Mario song and accompanying animated music video, the result of a collaboration between Brentalfloss (of Mega Man, Super Mario World and Tetris song fame) and Parker Simmons. Good lookin', guys. Also, who knew that Link had Hepatitis? I mean, b... / Continue →
  • November 4, 2009
    First of all, I thought we all agreed to call it H1N1 or the swine flu and NOT the Mexican Flu. Geez, no need to point fingers. Obvious racism aside, Belgian telecommunications company Telenet has suggested a way to shake hands in which we can still greet each other, but with... / Continue →
  • October 30, 2009
    Germaphobe? Worried about the bovine flu (it's coming, you watch)? Tired of operating a keyboard when you're 99.98% sure The Superficial Writer was touching with himself while using it? Enter the $899 Vioguard self-sanitizing keyboard. The Vioguard keyboard is aimed at medi... / Continue →
  • September 28, 2009
    This is a graphic representation of all the McDonalds restaurants in the United States. As you might be able to tell, there are a lot of them. Some might even say a McMillion. But they'd be wrong, because there's only 13,000. This map is the brainchild of Stephen Von Worley,... / Continue →
  • May 28, 2009
    Well scientists have already created glowing dogs and cats, so it was only a matter of time before somebody did a monkey. Nice, guy, thanks for the AIDS. Though primates that make a glowing protein have been created before, these are the first to keep the change in their bloo... / Continue →
  • May 1, 2009
    If you haven't seen this already, allegedly, this is how it all began (but not really, so PLEASE don't email me about it). And, with the world in hysterics, DoIHaveSwineFlu.org has developed a web-based self diagnostic tool for the detection of swine flu. It takes just one mi... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2009
    You can now track the swine flu with Google Maps by going HERE. If a marker appears in your town, and you're a chick, take naked pictures of yourself and email them to me for verification I don't care what you do if you're a dude, but no naked pictures, please. Also, I'm a li... / Continue →
  • April 6, 2009
    Want to own the T-virus? Want to own the vial the T-virus came in? Well now you can, thanks to a $3,800 eBay auction for (one of?) the very vial(s) used in Resident Evil: Extinction! Direct from the set of Resident Evil:Extinction comes the very very key virus tube! This i... / Continue →
  • March 31, 2009
    No, it's not unprotected sex, it's a video showing how an infected AIDS cell spreads the disease to other, healthy cells. It's the first time the process has ever been caught on video, and scientists hope the information will help in the search for a cure. The study was made ... / Continue →
  • March 26, 2009
    That's right folks, a beefed up version of the Conficker virus, Conficker C is scheduled to wreak havoc on April 1st. Your grandparents may think it's just a joke, but it's no joke -- this is real life, son! What's known so far is that on April 1, all infected computers will ... / Continue →
  • March 13, 2009
    So apparently Avon is selling the T-virus to unsuspecting women who want fuller, plumper looking faces. Little do they know they're gonna get just the opposite! First from Avon: injectable-grade facial filler. A skin care breakthrough! Fullness perfected, not injected!* Drama... / Continue →