Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial

Results for "turtle"

  • November 8, 2013
    Meet Schildi. Schildi was a pet turtle living in Germany when he was abandoned (or escaped), and lost a leg in the real world. The real world -- it'll take your f***ing legs. Thankfully Schildi was rescued, and vets were able to amputate his mangled limb and replace it with ... / Continue →
  • December 26, 2012
    This is a giant Bowser LEGO mech built by cool dude Zane Houston. I'm not gonna lie, if Bowser used this thing to kidnap the princess I'd probably just let her go and start banging Toad instead. Years of battling Mario and Luigi has taken its toll on Bowser; to compensate he ... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    No, you don't. And this is why. Because they're f***ing terrifying. A very short list of other things you don't want to see in real life: a friend's asshole in the locker-room because they have shallow buttcheeks and bent over to pick up a towel. Now I know right now you might ... / Continue →
  • July 21, 2011
    In far less depressing (non-squid) animal news, a 12-year old African spur-thighed tortoise NAMED GAMERA (♫ Gamera is really neat, Gamera is filled with meat ♫) had to have its front left leg amputated after a severe burn and tissue damage. So what did the vets do? What a... / Continue →
  • October 14, 2010
    Some jerk went and drilled holes through the shells of his pet turtles so that he could attach wire handles to them and pick them up easier. But turtles don't even like being coddled! Master Splinter, yes. "They do have nerves in their shells, so it would have been painful f... / Continue →
  • August 21, 2010
    A giant-ass horned turtle (resembling Bowser) previously thought to be extinct for over 50,000 years may, in fact, have only died out 3,000 years ago. Break out the printing press, it's time to rewrite history books! Just wait till they find a live one. Dozens of bones found... / Continue →
  • July 5, 2010
    Ever wonder what it would be like to be a turtle? Chug a canister of ooze wearing a ninja turtle costume. Trust me, I know how these things work. Oooor watch this video from the the TortuCam! WTF's a TortuCam? A waterproof camera strapped to the back of a turtle, dummy! G... / Continue →
  • June 21, 2010
    Note: Video is after the jump because I just took a reading and there are unsafe levels of cuteness for the front page. This is a 1:12 video of a kitten catching a free ride on a turtle while the theme from Diddy Kong Racing plays. It's cute. Well, provided you don't think t... / Continue →
  • May 23, 2010
    If you're reading this on Sunday, it's World Turtle Day. But if you're reading this on Monday, it's the day after World Turtle Day. And if you aren't reading this till Tuesday or later I think it's pretty obvious you don't love me anymore and that makes me a very sad boy. An... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    NOTE: Video is after the jump. You ever wanted to see a soft shelled turtle ride a Roomba? Me neither, but I did anyway. Needless to say, I wasn't surprised when the robotic d-bag kept ramming our reptilian brethren into chair legs and shit. Such a jerk. Which is exactly w... / Continue →
  • October 7, 2009
    This is a mammogram ultrasound of a woman who, quite clearly, is gonna give birth to a Super Mario character. It came with the following note: I think maybe Amy has been playing too much Nintendo.... (When you work around designers - it only takes an off hand half-mention o... / Continue →
  • March 10, 2009
    This is a video of somebody's pet turtle having sex with a shoe. It's possibly NSFW if you carry your house on your back or live in a pond. You need to watch it with audio though, because the little guy makes the cutest squeaky noises while he's going at it. Kind of like me,... / Continue →