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Results for "so it's come to this"

  • November 30, 2015
    Because this is the internet we deserve (Chewbacca toilet paper dispenser HERE), here's a video of a Coca-Cola Zero can being slid across a table and sounding remarkably like everybody's favorite Wookiee. Unless your favorite Wookiee is Wicket. "Wicket was an Ewok." No, Wick... / Continue →
  • November 11, 2015
    Groupon (of all places) is selling these clip-in man buns for men who want hair buns but don't have the hair or know-how. They're allegedly a $65 value (AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA) but only $10 if you act now. Over 5,000 have already been bought, presumably as gag gifts or I don't want... / Continue →
  • October 16, 2015
    Because it's clearly somebody's job at Disney to make sure there's a licensed Star Wars version of every product, these are the Darth Vader and R2-D2 shower heads from Oxygenics (and available at Bed Bath & Beyond). Each has three settings: spray, jet, and mixed. R2 costs $25... / Continue →
  • October 14, 2015
    This is the Bridal Selfie Stick introduced by fashion designer Reem Acra at her recent 2016 fall bridal show (I'm just trying to ignore the headphones). It's basically a regular selfie stick that's been bejeweled and had a little flower accent added at the bottom (which is pre... / Continue →
  • October 8, 2015
    This is a video demonstration of Disney's new augmented reality system that allows a child to see a 3D version of the character they're coloring as they're coloring it. Obviously, I would have drawn a penis on that elephant IMMEDIATELY. Apparently Crayola already did somethin... / Continue →
  • September 28, 2015
    The Pooch Selfie is a smartphone attachment that holds a tennis ball above the camera so your dog will look at it when you're taking pictures of them. It's an already funded Kickstarter campaign so $13 will get you one when they ship this December. Me? I get my dog to look a... / Continue →
  • September 25, 2015
    In news that shouldn't surprise anybody who's ever seen somebody in the car beside them trying to take the perfect driving selfie, human vanity has killed more people so far this year than shark attacks (12 to 8). Surprisingly, the majority have actually been tourists trying t... / Continue →
  • September 18, 2015
    Because this is the world we live in, these are the Star Wars character themed Coffee-Mate creamers (I actually saw the R2-D2 one at the grocery store yesterday, I love grocery shopping!). Apparently everybody wants on that Star Wars bandwagon, even coffee creamer companies. ... / Continue →
  • September 4, 2015
    Because a lot of the people having kids are the ones who shouldn't be redneck yokels, there has been a significant increase in the number of children born in the US being named after guns. Obviously, I am going to name my firstborn Laser Blaster Pew Pew, especially if it's a g... / Continue →
  • September 2, 2015
    Because soon every product will be available with a Star Wars theme (I honestly thought we were already there), these are the officially licensed Chewbacca fur-lined Crocs. They are available in both children's sizes ($40) and adult sizes ($60) up to a men's 13. Of course if ... / Continue →
  • June 18, 2015
    Note: Trailer contains no nudity but is still NSFW on account of dirty sex words. Link to Youtube video HERE (they disabled embedding). This is the trailer for a Wood Rocket p0rn parody of Pokemon, called Strokemon. That screencap of Pikachu alone is enough to ensure I won't... / Continue →
  • December 4, 2014
    Well it wasn't really going to BREAK Youtube, it was more of a Y2K sort of thing. Here, just read this while I head down to the break room to put a Lean Pocket in the microwave, take it out, throw it in the trash, then cry about my life for awhile while people awkwardly try to... / Continue →
  • October 27, 2014
    PROTIP: Seriously, don't read the product description. Because this is the world (that I want to blow up) that we live in, here's a $60 'Sexy Ebola Containment Suit' Halloween costume being sold over at BrandsOnSale. You know, because you heard something about Ebola on the ne... / Continue →
  • September 15, 2014
    In an effort to raise awareness of the dangers of walking and texting, China has opened separate walkways for people who are using their cell phones, and people who aren't. They're meant to be ironic though, and encourage people to think before texting and knocking over somebo... / Continue →
  • September 11, 2014
    Because this is the world we live in, this is the $20 SelfieBrush, an iPhone case with a thin mirror on the front and a brush on the back. It makes the perfect accessory for the vain woman in your life. Or man. Or a hairy cat. My cats used to love being brushed and getting ... / Continue →
  • July 14, 2014
    This is a series of photos showing the process that sad and single ARuFa used to turn an ordinary shower head into a beautiful girlfriend. And by beautiful I mean she looks like the girl who craws out of the TV in The Ring. Is he like...going to pleasure himself to that? Wha... / Continue →
  • April 1, 2014
    Finally, some decent Happy Birthday and wedding themed ass-wiping paper! This is the $250/roll gold foil embossed toilet paper produced by German manufacturer Tissue Design (previously: $1.3-million a roll 22-karat gold toilet paper -- this is the pauper's version). It's not ... / Continue →
  • February 6, 2014
    Seen here looking surprisingly more ogre than troll, 24-year old Michelle Chapman poses for her mugshot after being arrested for trolling herself on Facebook. Just let that sink in for awhile. Then, grab a bucket or wastebasket and try to catch the pieces of your brain as the... / Continue →
  • January 17, 2014
    With air pollution nearly 26-times as dense as the World Health Organization considers safe, residents of Beijing watch the sunrise on a giant video monitor because you can't see the real thing. Pfft, who wants to see the sunrise anyways? I want to wake up at noon. Then go b... / Continue →
  • January 8, 2014
    In news that shouldn't surprise anybody who's been wedgied so hard they could taste elastic, a 58-year old Oklahoma man died after receiving an atomic wedgie (over the head) from his 33-year old stepson. For reference, that is far too f***ing old to be giving people wedgies (w... / Continue →