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Results for "black hole"

  • May 8, 2012
    This is a computer model of a supermassive black hole 2.7-billion light years away sucking the gas off a red giant, based on the recent observations of such an event by astronomers using the Galaxy Evolution Explorer (GALEX) and Pan-STARRS telescope in Hawaii. Why they couldn'... / Continue →
  • December 29, 2011
    This is a 1:50 scale replica of the Large Hadron Collider's ATLAS detector recreated out of 9,500 LEGO pieces. 9,500 LEGO pieces that cost $2,590. That's 27-cents apiece! That's way too f***ing much! [The piece was built by] Sasha Mehlhase, a physicist from the Niels Bohr I... / Continue →
  • August 12, 2011
    Not Alderaan? Seen here in an artist's rendition that may or may yes have involved Photoshopping two holes out of a bowling ball, printing that out, and gluing it to a piece of construction paper, the current record holder for the universe's darkest known planet is seen refl... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    A massive and very, very wet black hole was recently discovered by asstronomers (you have no idea the amount of shame I live with), and is currently categorized as both the largest AND farthest water source in the known universe. And, since it's only 30-billion-trillion miles ... / Continue →
  • January 21, 2011
    Pfft, you can already see thousands of suns every night! Some nutjob, probably high on telescope-cleaning fluid, is convinced Betelgeuse (the star, not the Tim Burton movie) is going to supernova soon, resulting in the brief appearance of two suns in the sky. Wait a minute -... / Continue →
  • August 23, 2010
    This is a picture of a super-massive black hole erupting and spewing all kinds of outerspace shit everywhere. How massive is super-massive? Try six billion times bigger than our sun. I told you that dim bastard was a runt! This is a composite of two images, one taken in rad... / Continue →
  • May 28, 2010
    Allegedly this is a letter received by the Institute of Physics that was written by a youngster concerned about the Large Hadron Collider. And I'd almost believe it too if the handwriting and drawing weren't so perfect. But what really tipped me off was the intentional misspe... / Continue →
  • April 1, 2010
    Astronomers at the University of Arizona recently discovered two really old-ass black holes. Interesting, scientists, but maybe you should consider careers in Geriatric ASStronomy (shoot me now, please -- aim to kill). As grimy and unkempt as our present-day universe is tod... / Continue →
  • October 15, 2009
    Two scientists in China have developed an electromagnetic black hole capable of sucking in and trapping microwaves (not my Kid's Cuisine!). Next stop: trapping visible light. The device, which works at microwave frequencies, may soon be extended to trap visible light, leading... / Continue →
  • July 9, 2009
    That's right folks, the people over at CERN are getting ready to fire the Large Hadron Collider back up this fall. And, well, it's been nice knowing you. Most of you anyways. Okay, just a few of you. Kidding, I love you all. GIMME KISSIES! To that end, CERN gave the LHC's... / Continue →
  • May 15, 2009
    Allegedly astronomers have discovered the universe's most massive black hole. How massive? Think my ex-wife's gaping pie-hole times three. Whatever gave birth to this monster can be real proud. The biggest black hole in the universe weighs in with a respectable mass of 18 bi... / Continue →
  • April 20, 2009
    Stephen Hawking, genius extraordinaire and a personal hero of mine (I heard he once piloted his wheelchair through a blackhole unscathed), has been hospitalized and is reportedly "very ill". [Cambridge University] said Hawking has been fighting a chest infection for several w... / Continue →
  • February 10, 2009
    Apparently now that the LHC has Google doing its bidding, it's taking it easy and won't become operational anytime soon. Unless September is considered soon, in which case, shit, I won't live to see the finale of LOST. The Large Hadron Collider could be switched back on in Se... / Continue →
  • December 1, 2008
    Well, that's a lie. Actually, no it's not. *brandishing crowbar* At least not if I have something say about it! Anyway, the LHC, which was thought to only be down until the spring, may not kill us all until late 2009, or even 2010. We're saved (but still be wary of terroris... / Continue →
  • October 14, 2008
    Researchers have recently made a material so dark it absorbs 99.9% of light, the closest yet to a "pure" black. The substance has a total reflective index of 0.045 percent -- which is more than three times darker than the nickel-phosphorous alloy that now holds the record as t... / Continue →
  • September 18, 2008
    The Royal Society of Chemistry in London recently held a contest to rename the Large Hadron Collider. The votes are in, and the doomsday machine's new name is *drumroll please*....Halo! After sifting more than 2,500 responses, ranging from The Big Banger to Infinite Devil M... / Continue →
  • September 12, 2008
    The Sensory Deprivation Skull is a little room you climb into when your wife won't stop nagging you about "cutting the grass" and "getting a job". It effectively blocks out light and wife-banter and will eventually make you go crazy and possibly even masturbate to vivid halluc... / Continue →
  • September 12, 2008
    This is a snapshot from one of the webcams positioned on the Large hadron Collider. Hit this link to view them, there's been a bunch of bustling around the past few days and I think I saw a guy trip and fall down the stairs on the left. Definitely worth checking out. And als... / Continue →
  • September 10, 2008
    CERN's Large Hadron Collider went online yesterday and completed it's first major test. The world's largest particle collider passed its first major tests by firing two beams of protons in opposite directions around a 17-mile (27-kilometer) underground ring Wednesday in what... / Continue →
  • August 27, 2008
    When the CERN Large Hadron Collider starts crashing particles into shit next month. I can hardly wait! Hit the jump for a highly questionable (yet informative) video of some chick singing a rap song about the collider.... / Continue →