Count Me In: The Thunder Child, An Uncapsizable Extreme Weather Speed Boat

February 19, 2018

This is a video demonstration of Safehaven Marine's XSV 17 Thunder Child, a high-speed extreme weather boat capable of doing 54 knots (~62MPH) with a range of 750 nautical miles that will roll itself back onto its hull in the event of capsizing. Impressive. It's available for sale too, but you have to contact them for the price which means it's probably something only a supervillain can afford. Now how am I supposed to get into supervillainy if I can't even afford a decent lair or superboat? It's like you don't stand a chance unless you were already born with a silver spoon in your mouth. And I definitely was not. I was born with a plastic Taco Bell spork in my mouth, and a Mexican Pizza in my heart. "True wealth." I guess I can't complain.

Keep going for three videos: a generic promo vid, an example of the boat righting itself after being held upside down (including footage from inside) and some extreme weather testing.

Thanks to Amdrian, who agrees that thing needs way more torpedoes and depth charges.

  • Evil Bastard

    If it's "uncapsizable," then why did they have to haul it over with a crane and a big ass strap?

  • asdfadfs

    this does not look uncapsizable, it can clearly be flipped upsidedown, it just won't sink.

    not that that helps all that much if you don't have a crane on hand to flip it back over like in the video

  • Bling Nye

    Seems ideal for smuggling... things.

  • Boobs?

  • Bling Nye

    And/or plums.

  • The_Wretched
  • carterdana

    Sail that thing up here to Newfoundland. Then hold my beer...

  • Robert A'Beuy

    Uncapsizable, as long as you have a strap and a crane.

  • Mark

    The strap went all the way under the keel to twist it upside down and was slack when it righted itself.

  • frankietheaxe

    I was going to bring this up since they obviously named it after the show, haha. I just pulled up the intro and they are even using similar music, and my wife pointed out that I apparently watched it for different reasons than the cool boat action…

  • You guys realize you made a bot the top comment?! This comment is below as a response to my comment about thunder in paradise.... they've done it. The robots have won. We officially can't tell the goddamn difference.

  • GeneralDisorder
  • Chaz Gomez

    That first image, looks like that red strap is lifting the boat...

  • Exactly. I want to think its there in case it doesn't flip, but it never goes slack. Its clearly pulling it over.

    Also, I hope the inside of this thing is all memory foam as the people inside are definitely having a bad time otherwise.

  • Uncapsizable? Challenge accepted.

    I'm gonna be shooting barrel rolls in the pipe, brah.

  • Andyman7714

    Can't imagine sitting in the cabin all through that and not losing one's lunch, dinner and breakfast.

  • Werewolf Jones

    Reminds me of the super boat they had in the Street Fighter movie.

  • Reminds me of the badass boat Hogan drove in Thunder in Paradise.

  • Adibobea9

    I was going to bring this up since they obviously named it after the show, haha. I just pulled up the intro and they are even using similar music, and my wife pointed out that I apparently watched it for different reasons than the cool boat action…

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