Well It's About Time: Elon Musk Selling $500 Flamethrowers

January 29, 2018

elon-musk-flamethrowers.jpg

To help fund his Boring Company projects, Elon Musk has begun accepting preorders for the $500 Boring Company flamethrower (plus applicable taxes and fees -- mine came out to $559.16 with $47 in taxes and $11.66 UPS ground shipping before I bailed on the order). As cool as the concept is, I'd hardly call them flamethrowers, they're more flametossers. They barely have any range! Besides, how awesome can a flamethrower be that's advertised as the "world's safest?" I don't want the world's safest flamethrower! For reference, you can get what I'd consider a real flamethrower like one of these for around $600 - $900. Now those things will actually do some ranged burninating. Still, if you want one of these you can order one, and I will absolutely play with it at your next barbecue. Probably inside waging battle against a 12-pack of paper towels.

Keep going for two short Instagram videos of the flamethrowers, including Elon running at his cameraman with one.

A post shared by Elon Musk (@elonmusk) on

A post shared by Elon Musk (@elonmusk) on

Thanks to K Diddie and MSA, who both agree fire is rarely not the answer.

  • Jenness

    Nothing could possibly go wrong with this. I mean, who doesn't want some random model putting on a ball cap shooting flames out of a stick she can barely hold up inches from your crotch as shown in the first video.

  • shashi

    Can imagine the director yelling at the dude:

    "Try not to think about to dying, dont bloody move and FUCKING SMILE!"

  • Chris Lev

    They look like they are about to play a fun game of fire tag.

  • this looks like the flamethrower that someone in tech would make

  • Tom Logan

    That isn't a flamethrower. It's an over priced torch. The X15 and the XM42 M are much better.

  • Jason Christopher

    Elon Musk will 100% build an Iron Man suit one of these days.

  • TheQiwiMan

    Nice to see Elon finally embracing the whole "Evil Genius Mastermind" moniker he was given years ago.

  • Ken

    Terraformed Mars poster

  • The_Wretched

    For the low price of $299.00, I'll sell you an adapter kit to hook it up to your favorite drone. For $2990, I'll sell the preadapted drone.

  • Meh

    Just out of principle I'll never going to give that dude money. Also if you want or really need a flamethrower, build one yourself and have something to be proud of.

  • Ollie Williams

    What's your beef with ol' Musky?

  • Meh

    Though its fun hearing innovative idea's, apart from the landing missile that eventually landed (that was cool), most of this stuff is purely marketing and not even realistic.

    Saw this great video about his tube missile transportation thing, which sounds awesome but its not even doable or well thought out. He'd be better off doing useful stuff.

    And this was pretty funny goo.gl/mnCkfU

  • Ollie Williams

    Do you feel the products produced by SolarCity and Tesla are marketing and not realistic? Also, the "tube missle thing"... are you talking about the Hyperloop?

  • Meh

    Yeah the Hyperloop is what i meant.

  • Ollie Williams

    Could be just a marketing ploy. Any new transportation infrastructure like that seems iffy until it's a reality. If it works out, going from LA to NY in 45 minutes seems pretty awesome.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I have a lot of issues with the hyperloop concept. I mean... why do they want to make it a vacuum chamber? That takes an already convoluted build and makes it 1000 times more complicated.

    Safety inside a vacuum chamber requires a tiny space ship with on-board air supply and things like carbon dioxide scrubbers in case it gets stuck in the tube. See "time of useful consciousness" chart for why it's so risky. If your tiny space ship (made by the lowest bidder) springs a leak and doesn't have emergency oxygen to keep you alive you'd be dead before you can say "oh shit".

    Then there's a potential collapse. Dude wants to bury metal tubes underground (which burying is good because it helps with the issues that stem from thermal expansion) then he wants to take the air out (operating pressure according to the original concept is stratosphere pressure which, TUC is under 5 seconds). So... about 12 to 14 PSI on the entire outside of the thing (just by removing the air) plus the weight of the ground on top of that... If you're wondering how long it takes for a metal tube to collapse under vacuum in open atmosphere... well, it goes from fine to crush in about half a second. One jagged rock destroys the whole tunnel.

    I'd say the hyperloop concept could work... But they need to abandon this shit-heel idea of making it a hypobaric deathloop. The amount of energy it takes to get air out of a chamber is pretty monumental and even if you have an airlock system that's gonna carry probably an energy amount that far exceeds the benefits of running a mag-lev in a vacuum.

    Mag-lev exists. Tunnels exist. Trains exist. All of those things are viable. A tiny mag-lev space-ship that travels inside some kind of death tube is totally possible But it's just pure lunacy to put humans inside it.

  • GeneralDisorder

    TL;WR - Don't put people in a tube and remove air... bad idea. People will die.

  • Meh

    Sure it sounds awesome, but making a 600 km long tube from metal is not going to work.

  • Munihausen

    Gubmint-provided energy credits funding Le Chiffre's moonshots, although apparently not enough. The joke's on us.

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