Okaaaay: Australian Birds Of Prey Purposefully Spread Wildfires

January 19, 2018


According to a recently published research paper, birds of prey in Australia (including the Black Kite, Whistling Kite and Brown Falcon) have been found to collect burning sticks from wildfires, later dropping them in other areas to scare prey out from hiding for easy hunting. That's right, WEAPONIZED FIREBIRDS:

The concept of fire-foraging birds is well established. Raptors on at least four continents have been observed for decades on the edge of big flames, waiting out scurrying rodents and reptiles or picking through their barbecued remains.

What's new, at least in the academic literature, is the idea that birds might be intentionally spreading fires themselves. If true, the finding suggests that birds, like humans, have learned to use fire as a tool and as a weapon.

So, what do you think -- are they doing it intentionally or not? Because there's also the possibility that they think they've picked up a barbecued snake and drop it when they realize it's just a stick. Whatever the case, when reached for comment about the phenomenon, Smokey The Bear was spotted at a Bass Pro Shop buying a shotgun.

Thanks to Joe Soap, who agrees it's only a matter of time until birds are firebombing our cars instead of shitting on them.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I always knew birds were assholes.

  • Captain Matticus, LP Inc.

    Australia. It's always Australia.

  • Guesticle

    except when it's africa being even worse

  • Jenness

    Australia is not just the place we sent human convicts. It's clear that God sent all the asshole psycho animals there first.

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  • Bling Nye

    Smokey doesn't have a middle name, it's just "Smokey Bear".

    "In 1952, Steve Nelson and Jack Rollins wrote the popular anthem that would launch a continuous debate about Smokey’s name. To maintain the rhythm of the song, they added “the” between “Smokey” and “Bear.” Due to the song’s popularity, Smokey Bear has been called “Smokey the Bear” by many adoring fans, but, in actuality, his name never changed. He’s still Smokey Bear." https://smokeybear.com/en/s...


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