Because mini versions of yesteryear's gaming consoles are all the rage right now, Commodore will be releasing a 50% sized Commodore 64 in early 2018. The unit will come preloaded with 64 games and retail for $70. Obviously, I'm going to buy as many as I can with the intention of reselling them on Ebay for triple their value, but will abandon my scheme after realizing I don't have enough money to even buy one. It takes money to make money, you know. I wish you could just print it on a home computer. Why's the government so against that?
Keep going for a couple more shots, including some of the games.
Thanks to my buddy Josh B, who agrees mini consoles are perfect for hiding in your anus if you're going to jail. Wait, what?