German Man Gets His Unit Stuck In Barbell Weight At Gym, Firefighters Spend 3 Hours Freeing Him

September 18, 2017

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Some ridiculous pervert in Worms, Germany, recently got his member stuck in a 2.5kg (~5.5-pound) barbell weight at a gym, after which it took firefighters three hours to remove the weight with the help of a grinder and hydraulic saw. A couple things: 1) boner exercises are HOME EXERCISES. Weights at the gym are COMMUNITY weights and should only be handled by hand. If you want to have sex with the equipment you should buy your own for home use. 2) the hole in those weights is pretty big, so I'm not convinced this wasn't just a poorly designed publicity stunt to score dates (who wants to date a guy who bangs weights?) and 3) if you ever get your wiener stuck in a weight at the gym you have officially lost your right to a penis and first responders should just lop it off and be on their way. Seriously, I actually had to yell at a guy for trying to have sex with a piece of gym equipment last weekend. "He was just using the inner-thigh machine." It looked inappropriate!

Thanks to MSA, for inspiring me to follow my dreams and open my own sexual exercise gym in my garage.

  • Sfp777

    There is so much misinformation and so many bogus products surrounding penis enlargement that when they discover the solution, no one will believe. So here goes; any male can permanently increase length and girth in the same way a bodybuilder adds mass and becomes larger. As you stress tissue, the body goes into a natural process of creating new cells making you larger. The question is not whether permanent enlargement is possible but instead, how do you safely stress penile tissue to promote cell growth? The answers can be found by looking up Magnum Rings on Facebook or online.

  • Luke William

    I thought weightlifters were supposed to use Grapefruits? Right Kai? :0

  • GeneralDisorder

    The spotter was of no assistance. In fact all the spotter did was pull out his phone and record video while laughing.

  • Nicholas Conrad

    But wait, how many reps did he manage? I'm sure how ever many it's a Guinnes record.

  • Enkidu98

    This could only happen in Worms.

  • ETRAUD NIVEK

    Actually this post is bullshit he couldn't have gotten his penis stuck in the plate hole because no penis is hard for 3hrs straight,after an erection it becomes flaccid and small.

  • Bling Nye

    If you knew how a penis worked, you'd know that blood inflates the spongy tissue of the penis to make it hard. If the blood is trapped in the penis (for example something is constricting it like the weight in this guy's case), it won't "deflate" and get soft again; it simply can't. The options are to drain blood from the penis, or remove whatever is restricting the blood flow.

  • Bling Nye

    DOYOUEVENLIFTBRO?!

  • Draco Basileus

    What? No video this time?

  • Tigerh8r

    That's not an olympic weight, it only has a one-inch hole, how did he get it in there to start with?

  • Love it when the thumbnail for the "Next Story" fits as a reaction to the "Current Story".

  • James Mcelroy

    yeah, everyone knows you should just tie the weight to a string and then tie that to your wiener. I mean, right?

  • Geekologie

    exactly

  • Big Dog on Krampus

    someone gave him misinformation about kegels

  • James Mcelroy

    he may have been in training for cock push-ups.

  • Meh

    Why do they do it..

  • Ollie Williams

    I'm confused on how this would happen. Once he went limp, even if he was a "big guy", a little butter or lubricant should be able to get him out of that.

  • Hazakabammer

    One time I got my dick stuck in a cockring that was too small (lazy, should've read the size guide.) My member started turning purple and started really throbbing with pain. Out of fear that it would start to necrotise from lack of blood flow/oxygen, I jacked off with it on. After I came it took all of 5 minutes for my dick to go limp. I'm not sure if the colour ever went back to normal though (very slight purple tint) and I'm pretty sure my member is bigger now when I get a boner because of the blood entering the penis and stretching it out, which is basically how dick pumps work. Scariest moment of my life was when it started turning purple. I will never forget the utter fear that my dick might have to be amputated. I will never again use anything on my dick that shouldn't be there, that includes your gross ass old mom.

  • Ollie Williams

    The wellfare of your penis had me on pins and penises. I mean needles. Balls.

  • Hazakabammer

    I'm surprised I was able to jerk off through the pain, it was like a throbbing ache, like imagine you've been working out really intense (causing the muscle tissue to have micro-tears which is what causes the pain after a work out) then working out two more times the next day. That's the pain I had in my dick as the blood flowing to it was inflating it and causing the tissue to tear the longer I had an erection.

    Holding my breath helped, I remembered that when people suffocate they have an involuntary orgasm before they die, so I just held my breath and jacked off and came in like 2-3 minutes. It was an emergency jack off and the wave of relief after my dick slipped out of the ring, man, indescribable. It was aching and I had a chub for the next two days though.

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