Finally, An Officially Licensed Zelda Master Sword Letter Opener

September 26, 2017

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This is the $20 officially licensed Legend of Zelda Master Sword Letter Opener designed and sold by ThinkGeek. It's metal, looks like Link's master sword (complete with resin pedestal) and can be used to open letters. It can also be used to stab the leg of your brother under the dinner table. I said give me the rest of your roll and mashed potatoes. Do people even use letter openers anymore? I open letters the same way I always have: not opening them and throwing them straight in the trash because they're all just bills or 40% APR credit card offers anyways. The only thing I do open are birthday cards, and those ones are easy to identify because they're already open and the money is missing because my postman is a dirty thief.

Keep going for a couple more shots.

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Thanks to Ron With The Glove, who, wait -- is that a Power Glove?! Can you rub my shoulders?

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