Real Products That Exist: $2,625 Saint Laurent Stiletto Roller Skates

August 3, 2017

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These are the £2,000 (~$2,625) Saint Laurent stiletto roller skates. They're perfect for the woman looking to fashionably break both ankles. Did you know I'm a really good roller skater? Because I am. I even have my own street skates and sometimes I roller skate around the neighborhood for exercise. People are always yelling at me from their car windows and I like to pretend they're positive, inspirational messages instead of the horrible things they're actually saying.

Thanks to MSA, who, wait -- did you hear that? It was the couple skate bell, we have to couple skate now!

  • Bling Nye

    Have you ever stopped to wonder about the lack of products for men that would be equatable to something like this or even just plain ol' high heels...? Why don't men get the option to wreck their feet, toes and ankles for a chance to give their legs a bit more length and curve?

  • Jenness

    We have that already Bling.

    Men: It's called a good job, owned home (not rental), owned car, paying for dinner, dates, vacations, and getting paid a teensy bit more.

    Women: Makeup, beauty products, diet products, cosmetic surgery, more clothes, spanx, designer heels, doctor’s appointments for diet pills and contraception. Oh and until she meets a guy she has to pay rent, car and bills and some meals. The more beautiful the woman the more % of income goes on beauty.

    Men have less items but financially when you add all the costs up it's kind of equal in terms of % of income.

    Go figure - all these years feminazi's are bitching but in reality it's just because those whores can't do fucking math.

  • Sexual dimorphism. Highest sexual market value of women has been judged to be their youth and fertility signals, hence why every aspect of makeup that has stuck around to become popular mimics or draws attention to physical signals of a woman's youth and fertility (lipstick and blush mimics sexual arousal, eyeliner and mascara = younger/larger eyes, which is associated with youth, etc) - whereas highest sexual market value for men has been judged to be our ability to provide resources for women and offspring. (Hence why so many men buy the expensive cars, Rolexes, etc as popular visual cues to attract women)

    Or as Robert California sums it up: https://s-media-cache-ak0.p...

  • Bling Nye

    It was rhetorical, really. You could've easily also said "patriarchal society". Decent response for sure, it's just not actually ALL about sex; sexual dimorphism and biological rolls are factors, but it all has to fit within the social construct... Imagine how it could easily go the other way with an overly-matriarchal (e.g. equatable with today's gender "equality" with a similar historic trajectory, just flip male for female) society where males are say, required (and by required, I mean "required" in the same sense women are "required" to wear high heels now) to wear heavy weights as a way of displaying their vigor, or a flashing LED display on their chest with their updating net worth. I mean, why not? :)

  • I want to live in that reality.

  • Bling Nye

    DEATH BY SNU SNU.

  • Draco Basileus

    Do these come with a free stripper pole?

  • GeneralDisorder

    Would you entrust your stripper's safety to a free pole?

  • Irina Abramovich

    Draco Basileus:

    Here I am logging into my other account, under a disguised name, to write about how fat afterooster's wife is:

    These shoes don't come with a stripper pole because afterooster's wife is too fat to be a stripper. Although she is not too fat to be a fat scarecrow for Halloween and also, she's not too fat to be in weight loss advertisements for Lean Cuisine or maybe weight disease hair loss advertisements. She is SUPER FAT.=)

    <3 Thomas

    Hubree: You're my favorite anorexic #1 Kitten in the whole white world!!!=)
    Irina: Best Princess Costume is worn by you today!

  • When Vanity and Stupidity have a baby, ankles get broke.

  • GeneralDisorder

    Alternate title: This is what crossfitters actually believe

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