You Monster: Woman Goes In For Cataract Surgery, Doctors Find 27 Contacts In Eye

July 17, 2017

contacts-in-eye-1.jpg

A 67-year old lady in England recently went to the hospital for routine cataract surgery when her doctors found 27 contacts in one of her eyes. Seventeen of them were stuck together in a single clump, and the other ten were floating around loose, all behind her upper eyelid. Some more info while I puke my brains out and make myself promise to only wear glasses from now on:

As reported in the British Medical Journal, the unnamed patient was unaware that the contact lenses were missing. Incredibly, the 27 lost lenses, which had drifted behind her upper eyelid, weren't causing her any serious distress. She figured her dry eyes and periodic discomfort were just a product of old age.


"None of us have ever seen this before," noted surgeon Rupal Marjaria, who filed the BMJ report, in Optometry Today. "It was such a large mass. All the 17 contact lenses were stuck together. We were really surprised that the patient didn't notice it because it would cause quite a lot of irritation while it was sitting there."

Apparently the woman has worn disposable monthly contacts for over 35 years, but failed to actually dispose of 27 of them. And how were there 27 in one eye but none in the other? The woman admits to having not "visited her optometrist in quite some time," which makes me wonder just how the hell she was getting contacts without a prescription (mine only lasts a year). Maybe she had stockpiled them? Whatever the case, I'm going to take my contacts out right now to give my eyes a break and crash my car on the way home.

Keep going for a disgusting shot of all the contacts separated from one another.

contacts-in-eye-2.jpg

Thanks to hairless, who's worlds better than being eyeless.

  • sizzlepants

    Two things

    1 - Disposable contact lenses can last a lot longer than specified on the package WITH PROPER CARE AND CLEANING.

    2 - Not all cleaning solutions are the same. If you're using disposable lenses (and as a result don't use the tablet cleaners to remove protein buildup and disinfect the lens) then make absolutely certain the multi-purpose solution you use for daily cleaning (don't be gross) has a disinfecting agent. Especially if you're trying to save a couple of dollars with a cheaper / generic brand.

    I learned #2 the hard way back in the day when I ended up with a pseudomonas infection in my right eye and had to spend like 10 days in the hospital to keep it from rotting out of my skull. I've since gone back to wearing glasses hahaha.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I had "uveitis" (which is an inflammation of the uvea layer including the iris). That was quite possibly the most pain I can imagine. It was unbelievably painful to go from a dark room to a slightly less dark room. I had to wear tinted lenses and the treatment involved dilating drops for around two months. I also had to take steroid drops for almost four years as well.

    It was very bad. I smoked tons of weed in college and a few years ago asked my eye doctor if contacts were possible. He said "yeah, I don't see why not. You haven't taken drops in how long? Sure. Go for it."

  • I hope I don't lose my goddam mind when I'm 67.. :-(

  • steve holt

    Not my proudest fap.

  • Talon184

    The eyes are the window to one's........stupidity

  • Irina Abramovich

    One time I saw a kitten as cute as God and I saved those pictures for nighttime, when I masturbate the most.

    <3 Thomas

  • Irina Abramovich

    Irina,

    Can you send me those pictures?... I've been in a rut with my husband!

    Thanks,
    Thomas

  • afterooster

    you forgot to log in to your other account when you replied to yourself. you'll get it next time, champ.

  • Irina Abramovich

    Thanks, afterooster!! I was saying hi to my girlfriend, Irina. She is super cute and sweet. I will login to my other account when I write about how fat your wife is. Thanks!!!

    <3 Thomas

  • afterooster

    not my wife! for the love of god no; please, i'm begging you!

  • afterooster

    Haha! You're scared now, you fat fuck! Your wife is doomed!

    <3 Thomas

  • Irina Abramovich

    afterooster,

    My girlfriend is a sweetie!=) Here I am logging into my other account to write about your wife -- "AHA afterooster's wife likes to eat olive oil and high in cholesterol foods!!!=)"

    <3 Thomas

  • afterooster

    Irina Abramovich,

    Your girlfriend is so hot! You got afterooster good. His wife is probably dead now and he's crying. Keep it up home boy!

    Thanks,
    Thomas

  • Irina Abramovich

    afterooster,

    I heard afterooster's wife get extra liquid butter on her popcorn at the movies and all the movies she sees are for Weight Watchers commercials, but she reads also newspaper insert advertisements for weight gain, oops, I mean for weight loss. I'm going to go stuff my face with pizza NOW -- YUMM!!!=) Here I am logging into my other account to write a joke about afterooster's wife... logging into to account, setting up disguised name, and now I'm ALL set: I heard afterooster's wife looks like she gave birth to 80 quintuplets and hasn't lost any of the pregnancy weight.

    My girlfriend Irina is super fun and cute!!=) Hi, Irina!!=)=)

    <3 Thomas

  • afterooster

    poop.

  • Irina Abramovich

    Afterooster,

    Is this really happening?? Afterooster is coming out to reveal to Geekologie fans that his wife is finally ready to lose weight by pooping for the first time at the age of 45 after eating at least 2000 cheeseburgers every day of her life and also 2000 Large french fries also every day. MMMMmmmmmm. YUMMY!!! I love McDonald's cheeseburgers and french fries.

    Hi, Irina, would you like to go on a date to McDonald's soon? Let me know, sweet baby.=)

    <3 Thomas

  • afterooster

    hey irina and thomas! it's been a while, guys. how've you been? anything new going on? not much on my end! anyway it's good to talk to you guys again! see you later!

  • Irina Abramovich

    Hi afterooster,

    Thanks for writing!=) Everything is perfect with us-- it's a big, hot, sweaty, orgy every day!=)

    <3 Thomas

    Hubree: I love it when you wear Raptor costumes when we're making out!=)=)=)
    Irina: Let's get a fan for love making!=)

  • afterooster

    that's awesome guys. any baby plans? you and irina would make the cutest parents! also if you guys want the number of a good air condition guy let me know, my friend installs them. It sounds like your orgies get incredibly hot so be careful not to overheat yourselves!

  • Irina Abramovich

    Thanks, afterooster!=) I like the feeling of air conditioning on my balls!

    <3 Thomas

    Hubree: I love your fur-- very cute!=)=)=)
    Irina: Let's get afterooster's wife pregnant! She's probably still fertile and would probably have tiny, fat babies with chubby feet that like olive oil!

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