What The Hell Was That?: River Monsters Go Nuts When Man Bails Out Boat

June 21, 2017

florida-river-monsters.jpg

This is a video from (where else?) Florida of a man bailing rainwater out of his boat and disturbing the local river monsters. Just what the hell were those things? Catfish? Gators? Somebody said they were manatees. Were they manatees? WERE THEY MERMAIDS? "Definitely not mermaids." You can't say that, you can't even see them in the video. Maybe they were all topless and just didn't want to flash the camera, did you ever think of that? "No." Well maybe you should start. "Start what?" A secret club, but you have to name me second in command. Hurry though, I want to be able to add that to my dating profile so I can brag about it.

Keep going for the video.

Thanks to hairless, who agrees you should never disturb the local river monsters unless you need desperate help on a quest.

  • Dobratev

    Huh.... Alligators. In the Florida Glades who would of guessed?!
    Next.

  • paperboy

    Fuck. That.

  • HP laptop & printer Support

    I think those are crocodile.
    coz water looks like shallow here.
    HP Support

  • NeoLythic

    They're manatees. Apparently they were bumpin' uglies and this guy throwing "something" (water?) into the river freaked them out. He's currently under investigation for interrupting a manatee orgy.

  • GeneralDisorder

    I bet some of those manatees were under age.

  • Jenness

    Really? link it because that's pretty fast manatee moving. I've swam with them and they are not very fast - like big sweet sea dogs that grab your leg and beg you for lettuce. (Seriously - in Cozumel this is the BESTEST most amazing thing to do - you feel like a mermaid and they are so sweet and you fall in love with them.)

  • NeoLythic

    I know right!? I've seen them in Florida and they seem pretty docile, but I can't think anything else bug enough to make such a ruckus.

    http://wfla.com/2017/06/21/...

  • Jenness

    WOW - I can't get over that, they were so fast!! Cool - well that really puts my idyllic manatee swim into perspective. Glad I shoved tons of lettuce into their mouths or they might have turned psycho.

  • Sean Mallia

    Looks fake, looks like balloons popped underwater

  • ryanroehl

    Have you ever tried to get a balloon under water to where you can't see it? Go try and see if you still think that's what they did.

  • Sean Mallia

    1, Black balloons (Sizeable)
    2, Rope
    3.Bricks
    4.????
    5.Profit

  • KungFuTreachery

    wut

  • Sean Mallia

    Whats wrong

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