ThinkGeek Adds New Two-Piece Swimsuits To Its Star Trek 'Trekini' Line

April 20, 2017

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Well, summer is just around the corner. Also: a man who told me he'd try to gnaw off his own pinky for $10. I'm trying to collect an office pool to make that happen so I can film it and launch my own Youtube channel. Enter ThinkGeek's latest addition to their Star Trek swimwear line: the Star Trek original series inspired two-piece ($60/set). Previously, their one-pieces and cover-ups). They come in blue (with Science insignia), gold (Command insignia), and red (Engineering insignia) and sizes S-4X. Not only that, but you can pick different sized tops and bottoms, because, our bodies, like snowflakes, are like snowflakes. I'm great at metaphors. "That was a simile." Well clearly I'm pretty good at those too. I'm gonna wear a red one and get eaten by sharks!

Keep going for a handful more shots.

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Thanks to Allyson S, who made me promise to buy her a yellow one, which I lied about and said they were out of stock.

  • Zachary Zarko

    Any woman who wears the red version is sure to be attacked by sharks.

  • Fire a volley of photon torpedoes, maximum spread!

  • Russell Bullock

    As soon as I saw the first picture, I wondered how many comments I would read through before seeing an argument erupt over the size of the models. Didn't take long =(

  • reave

    I find the lack of belly button with a two-piece suit to be quite disturbing.

  • Captain Matticus, LP Inc.

    Saved

  • DFCtomm

    I have no problem with being fat, I could drop a couple of pounds myself, but if you are fat, do not go bare midriff. Nobody wants to see rolls of blubber. However, it is funny to see women attempt to talk men into viewing fat chicks as sexy. It's like watching a used car salesman trying to make a sale to a dead guy. They can talk, and talk, and talk, but that sale isn't happening.

  • If they get you wet and/or hard they're sexy.

  • Bling Nye

    Set phasers to sexy.

  • Jenness

    These actually are pretty cute and look like you can actually swim in them and be useful.

  • MustacheHam

    These are pretty good designs for tribute swim-ware. I like how the bright colors work well with different complexions.

  • Andrew Newton

    Bridge to captain frumpy.

    The one piece suits are actually flattering to different sizes. Even tennis outfits are shorter and cuter.

  • qcp

    Scotty is gonna need to use a wide beam for a couple of those ladies.

  • Ijustsharted

    Doesn't matter, neither one would sleep with you, just like the rest of women.

  • DFCtomm

    You need some new material. Sex shaming men is AOK, but body shaming women is #evil. Your lack of self awareness is funny as shit.

  • But both are dickish and both can be funny though, right?

  • DFCtomm

    Anything can be funny, but which one of those comments was an attempt at humor and which was just raw stinky butthurt?

  • reave

    Ding Ding Ding!

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