Different Strokes For Different Folks: $100 Alien Baby Dolls

April 24, 2017

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Because there's a market for absolutely everything, this is the $100 Alien Baby Doll created by Kosart Studios and available from The Bradford Exchange (and presumably Hammacher Schlemmer before Christmas). It looks like a Roswell alien baby and I plan on putting one in a baby stroller and pretending it's a real baby because I have absolutely no clue how to live life.

At 16 inches long, this adorable alien baby doll is fully sculpted with four fingers and three toes on each tiny hand and foot. He is crafted of soft vinyl and coated with a silky smooth finish, then painted by hand. His large black eyes are custom-made to replicate those documented from Roswell. His jointed arms and legs are poseable, and his head pivots to look for intelligent life. He even comes with his own cosmic baby blanket to keep him cozy. This baby alien doll is sure to make you starry-eyed and he makes a unique gift for a fellow believer, but strong demand is anticipated, so don't delay. Order now!


Fine adult collectible, not intended for children under 14.

Did you read that? Not intended for children under 14. Thirteen year olds cannot be trusted with an alien baby doll. Get them an American Girl Doll instead. Or, give them what I give all thirteen year olds: a hard time for being on my lawn. *pointing garden hose* Stop stealing all the Pokemon in my yard, they're mine!

Keep going for a couple more shots in case you're not sure if this is the right alien baby for you.

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Thanks to Jason R, who agrees this makes a significantly cheaper alternative to those $2,000 Avatar babies.

  • Meh

    I wonder how many seconds it took for a Chinese GENIUS to produce an alien sexdoll.

  • Anyone else get a cold shiver reading "Fine adult collectible, not intended for children under 14"?

  • Jenness

    Yep. Because everyone knows 14 year old babies still stick everything in their mouth and they'll choke on those enormous black plastic eyes.

  • I just hope I never meet any of these "fine adults" who actively try to collect these types of nightmares...

  • Draco Basileus

    Does it come with an anal probe pacifier?

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