Now That's My Kinda Guy: Man Wakes From 48-Day Coma, Immediately Demands Taco Bell

May 13, 2016

taco-bell-coma.jpg

35-year old Army veteran Jake Booth got pneumonia in February, had a heart attack, was dead for 15 minutes, brought back to life and immediately fell into a coma. Then, 48 days later, James woke up, and immediately demanded Taco Bell. That is like a food coma in reverse. What an American hero.

"He actually said, out loud, 'I want Taco Bell,'" Booth's brother told USA Today's "This Week in Taco Bell" (which, yes, is a recurring feature dedicated solely to news about the chain). "That was the very first thing he said."

Unfortunately for Jake, he wasn't allowed to eat solid foods for another three weeks. But finally last week doctors cleared Jake for solid food and he pounded eight and a half crunchy tacos from Taco Bell. What a glorious feeling that must have been. Plus he was already in the hospital which is the safest place to be if Taco Bell tears your butthole off -- doctors can just sew it right back on. There's a GoFundMe Page for Jake's continued recovery HERE. Get better soon you taco loving animal you.

Thanks to my pal/mortal enemy Terry, who tried to tell me he loves Taco Bell even more than Jake and I told him first I'd have to put him in a coma to prove it.

  • shashi

    I'm sorry your insurance doesn't cover this treatment but if you're willing to accept corporate sponsorship...

  • Andrew St. Andrew

    He prob had the heart attack from eating Taco Bell in the first place.

  • The_Wretched

    I feel sorry for the nurse who will help with cleaning up that mess.

  • Yao

    Taco Bell? He coulda aimed higher and demanded some real mexican food

  • Joel Nair

    What is mexican. I reckon Taco Bell rocks.

  • the antagonist

    You're joking right? Sure the original comment may have come off as snobby/elitist. (Food doesn't have to be authentic to be tasty.) But no one in his right mind, expert or not, thinks Taco Bell is real Mexican food, not even Taco Bell.

    Saying Taco Bell is real Mexican food is like saying Chef Boyardee is real Italian food.

  • Pat Patrix

    Really? You're defending Taco Bell as real Mexican food?

  • Yao

    Not Taco Bell, that's for sure. That stuff is nasty.

    Well then again, this guy lives in Florida. Can't blame him for not knowing what he's missing out on.

  • AC

    I don't think ones personal definition of real mexican food is relative here. It is mostly ubiquitous that taco bell doesn't qualify.

  • Bling Nye

    The look on his face as the Taco Bell goes in... will not be the look on his face as the Taco Bell comes out.

  • GeneralDisorder

    That's true of everything. Replace TB with needle... Replace TB with uh... other words for things that go in and out... Alright, my job here is done.

  • Ooo... ooo... I know something else that goes in and out...
    http://www.moillusions.com/...

  • "which, yes, is a recurring feature dedicated solely to news about the chain"

    I feel like the lede was buried.

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