Doodie! Doodie!: Finally, A Smiling Poop Emoji Pool Float

May 18, 2016

poop-emoji-pool-float-1.jpg

"So, this is my life." -- that model

Doodie was a reference to the pool scene in Caddyshack by the way, just so we're clear. This is the $20 smiling poop emoji pool float available on Amazon. Get a bunch of them and fill your pool with turds. That's a pretty awkward size and shape for a pool float. I'm not sure that thing could support Rose OR Jack if the Titanic was sinking. I guess it could be good for kids though. Kids love poop. Have I ever told you about the time I found a cat turd in the playground sandbox when I was a kid? I rolled it around and around in the sand pretending I was a dung beetle until a teacher saw what I was doing and took me by the arm and led me to the bathroom and made me wash my hands three times. I guess she didn't bother to have the sandbox cleaned though, because the same turd was still there the next day. You can imagine what I did. "Played dung beetle again?" Put it in my pocket to take home.

Keep going for one more shot of this model's big break.

poop-emoji-pool-float-2.jpg

Thanks to Anne, who's holding out for a pool float of the eye rolling emoji. Oh man, I use that one all the time. Honestly, that's pretty much all I text anyone anymore.

  • Joe Schmopped

    UhOh. From Amazon

    Item Under Review

    This item is currently unavailable because customers have told us there may be something wrong with our inventory of the item, the way we are shipping it, or the way it's described here. (Thanks for the tip!)

    We're working to fix the problem as quickly as possible.

  • So is modeling next to a giant poop a step UP from pr0n, or a step DOWN?

  • GeneralDisorder

    That would largely depend what genre you're in.

  • Good point, I always forget about Cartman's mom doing her "German Shitzer" videos..... :-/

  • Bling Nye

    That thing looks like a piece of shit.

  • Jenness

    Model's face in 2nd picture where she is hiding behind crap is great - that's not a smile, it's not even her making a "this is stinky" face - it's a lazy but still hateful grimace. This is just insane that someone spent money and any time to manufacture this. Cutting up money and throwing it in the trash seems more useful and purposeful than this.

  • GeneralDisorder

    They decided paying her to smile wasn't worth it and photoshopped the first image into a Joker smile. And they blew the photoshop budget on the first image and then gave up. What you don't see is the riflemen behind the camera making sure she doesn't run away.

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