Because news reporting is serious business (and nobody takes it more seriously than me), this is a video from a local news report about the recent tornado damage in Malakoff, Texas that gets interrupted when the reporter spots a dog sitting on a ride-on lawnmower. Honestly though, I would have done the same thing. "Gotten distracted?" What? No. I meant sit on that lawnmower if I was a dog. I imagine your 15 minutes of fame are pretty hard to come by in The Middle Of Nowhere, Texas, and you have to strike while the iron's hot. ESPECIALLY if you want to be the face of the new Purina dog food campaign. After a long day of work in the yard, you deserve Purina. I don't know, I'm just speedballing here. "Shooting cocaine and heroin?" Whoa, no, I think I meant snowballing. Spitballing? I was definitely some kind of balling. "Freeballing?" Haha, I'm always freeballing, but only because conventional underwear doesn't work for me.
Keep going for the video.
Thanks to Jeffrey S, who allegedly taught his dog how to pull weeds and plant flowers in the flower bed although I suspect that's a lie and the dogs capabilities actually stop at fertilizing.