The First Commercially Available Handheld Flamethrower

March 23, 2015

flamethrower-go-burninate.jpg

The XM42 is allegedly the world's first commercially available handheld flamethrower. Is that true? No clue, I've never been in the market for a flamethrower before. Jk jk, I have never NOT been in the market for a flamethrower. I have dozens. I basically sleep on a pile of flamethrowers. You can get a powdercoated or polished version for $799, or a brushed model for $699, AND START BURNINATING. In related news, arson will up a million percent this year.

Keep going for a brief video of the flamethrower flaming.

Thanks to the folks who made it, who should definitely send me one to review.

  • Stannis

    That was inspiring

  • Thog

    Could have seriously used one of these this winter, while chipping through 5 feet of ice at the end of my service driveway so I could get oil to heat my f*ng house!

  • steve holt

    what could go wrong?
    not even kidding, I seriously hope they don't ship this to the middle east

  • asdfasdf

    i think oilwells already have them

    same way the mining ship in alien just happened to have them

  • Andrew

    Aliens fan here.

    He built the flamethrower(s) in that movie. The captain ordered him to do it.

  • CaptainGuntu

    I'm expecting the NRA to be all over this for school security, policing, and home security. What could go wrong?

  • ODwanKenObi

    Looks Safe enough for the average Joe. Just what does the average Joe need this for though?

  • The_Wretched

    Dude, if you're not preparing to defeat the zombie Apocalypse, you are part of the problem.

  • ODwanKenObi

    Believe you me, I anticipated this line of reasoning while pontificating the use of said flame thrower. However, fire never was a safe way to extinguish a zombie. Fire does a slow job of melting the brain tissue to a point that the zombie will succumb to cerebral injury. A fire zombie is even deadlier than a non fire zombie because as they chase you they light surroundings on fire, including any housing you might run into for cover or worse, they light YOU on fire if they catch you. So, again I ask, what the hell does the average Joe need this for?

  • GeneralDisorder

    Also the only way a zombie apocalypse wouldn't just stop on its own is if Zombies are Day After Tomorrow rabid people (in which case they'll starve and die off so just seal them off and bug in for a while) or if they're propelled by some magic or alien technology. If zombies are propelled by magic they aren't going to notice that they're on fire. They're just gonna keep shambling (and we'll probably have walking skeletons too because fuck your prep work!!) and then you don't have the problem of "oh shit zombies" you have the problem of "oh shit, flaming zombies... They're not stopping. And now your everything is on fire including yourself".

    Besides if you prep for zombies you're gonna get crushed by economic collapse. If you prep for economic collapse, fuel war crisis... and if you're prepped for that... supervolcano. If you've prepped for that... well congrats. I can't foresee any feasible scenario you won't be prepared for except maybe ice age that follows supervolcano but if you have a seed cache and food supplies you'll be all set as long as you don't get buried under tonnage of ash.

  • GreyMatter

    $700 OR $600?...I'll just stick to my lighter and hair spray to kill that annoying mozzie thanks!

  • Sean Lally

    Do I have to don all that safety gear if I just want to shoot down a mosquito?

  • CaptainGuntu

    Becuase, you know, that's just what the world needs right now ...

  • Brad Walton

    Seems like a good idea...

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