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New Butter Knife Spreads Cold Butter With Ease

cold-butter-knife.jpg

In what is arguably the best invention since sliced bread, the Butterup Knife (links to Kickstarter where you can order one for around $11) was designed to easily spread cold butter without tearing your bread to shit. It works by grating a stick of butter into smaller, more easily spreadable ribbons. Alternatively, just jam a stick of butter into a Play-Doh Fun Factory and you can extrude any shape butter you want. Speaking of -- when I was a kid I used to sneak leftovers from the dinner table up to my room to run them through my Play-Doh Fun Factory. Mashed potatoes, steamed vegetables, lasagna, hot dogs -- you name it. Fun fact: all food tastes better if it's shaped like a star. I did the experiments to prove it. The least tasty shape? Turds.

Keep going for the Kickstarter video.

Thanks to Benjammin, who, at least in my mind, is wearing a rastacap and banging out a rhythm on a drum on a tropical beach somewhere. That's just what I see.

There are Comments.
  • I_Hate_Usernames

    cngfxdh fxdhb

  • MustacheHam

    ....perhaps....it can also be used for cheese. :D

  • BeastmanAIDS

    holy crap they've made a quarter of a million dollars over their goal... they've definitely addressed a dire first world issue!

  • disqus_k2QxOV9H7Z
  • MustacheHam

    haha! I was thinking that too... 8D

  • Ollie Williams

    Since GW didn't bother to link the damn Kickstarter campaign, here it is: https://www.kickstarter.com/pr...

  • WHISTLE TIP GOES WOO WOO

    WHAT A STUPID IDIOT THAT GUY IS! (I fixed it)

  • Ollie Williams

    I'm sorry, are.. are you the GW?

  • WHISTLE TIP GOES WOO WOO

    yes i keep forgetting the passwords to all my other discus accounts. i just make a new one every time usually. *holding sealed envelope to head* the next article is gonna be the harp twins!

  • Ollie Williams

    I honestly had no idea you even browsed the comments section. As a successful Internet blogger fancy-pants, I certainly didn't expect you would associate with the filthy degenerates in the comments section, myself included. I naturally assumed all the comments that had "GW" or other such monikers were some asshat pretending to be you.

  • zin

    Silly Ollie, we are all GW.

  • Ollie Williams

    That's deep, man.

  • ODwanKenObi

    Don't you feel silly now.

  • Ollie Williams

    I'm just happy to know the GW reads the comments, quite frankly. I've been on this website for about 7-8 years and I never knew that. I always assumed he writes a post, hits submit, jerks off to some dinosaur photos from a 1992 version of Encyclopedia Britannica, then takes a nap. Rinse and repeat until the weekend, where he likely schedules automatic post updates so he can go out and get hammered. That's what I'd do, anyway.

  • WHISTLE TIP GOES WOO WOO

    you aren't far off

  • Sean Lally

    Why is cold butter even an thing? Just leave the butter out on the counter...

  • zin

    It's a thing for real butter that isn't permanently solidified by additives.

  • Sean Lally

    I leave farm butter out all the time. Of course the house doesn't get hotter than 76F.

  • zin

    Touché. Mine rarely gets down to 20C.

  • Ollie Williams

    The fuck is this Celsius shit? 'MURICA!

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