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CockadoodleRAWR: 'Chicken From Hell' Dino Discovered

chicken-from-hell-dino.jpg

Prehistoric earth was black and white? Mindblowing!

The only chicken from hell I want is in nugget form and they better be SPICY. This thing looks like a naked man crouched in a chicken costume. I outlined him for you here. See? Meet Anzu wyliei, a recently discovered species of North American dinosaur, aka POLLO DIABLO. I have never met a chicken from hell before, but I have met a goose from there that sneak-attacked me when I was trying to feed bread to my duck friends.

For a Tyrannosaurus rex looking for a snack, nothing might have tasted quite like the "chicken from hell."


That's one way Matt Lamanna describes Anzu wyliei, the species of dinosaur that he and fellow paleontologists unveiled Wednesday.

It's not the only way, though. Feathered demon also works, which is why Anzu -- derived from Sumerian mythology -- was chosen as a name. Or you could characterize it, as Lamanna also told CNN, as a 600-pound cross between an ostrich and a velociraptor. And it's "pretty damn close" to looking like the 6-foot-tall turkey a child famously referred to in the movie "Jurassic Park," except a lot stranger and meaner looking.

Is it too late for me to become a paleontologist? Do you have to go to school and get a degree or can I just start calling myself one? Because I know a lot of people who lie about their jobs. Most people actually. I just keep it simple and tell everyone I'm a space ranger. Also, are dinosaur bones like, finders-keepers? I don't want any museums trying to steal my treasures. I want to sleep with them in my pajamas at night.

Thanks to MikeD, Jeremy and E V I L A R E S, none of whom mentioned those dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets in their emails. For shame, guys.


There are Comments.
  • KLanD

    Hey, would you look at that! It's Kirk Cameron's Croc'O'Duck.. lol.

  • Loudogf002

    The lack of research and education tells me that no, you can't and never will be a paleontologist. Btw, this is a species of ovaraptorid. It is related to velociraptors. And this is an important discovery because this type of aninal is formerly unkonwn in the americas.Wikipedia AT LEAST before you we rite articles and stop reducing science to shitty knick names and mcnugget references? Thanks...

  • Based on spelling and grammar alone, I'm gonna have to say that you should probably avoid attempting to call out other people on what you perceive as a lack of education.

    BTW,
    1. It's not ovaraptorid, it's oviraptorid. But since you are speaking of it as a species, what you really meant was oviraptoridae.
    2. it's not aninal, it's animal.
    3. It's not unkonwn, its unknown.
    4. It wasn't unknown in the Americas, just the first complete fossil specimen: "The occurrence of oviraptorosaurs in both Asia and North America was not a surprise to paleontologists, because these continents were frequently connected during the Mesozoic Era, allowing dinosaurs and other land animals to roam between them." -Sci-news (http://www.sci-news.com/paleon...

    5. It's not "before you we rite", I'm not even certain what you meant to say there but probably "before you write".
    6. It's not knick names, it's nicknames. One word, no k.

    Dictionary AT LEAST before you write tragically poor comments and stop reducing our favorite comedic blogger to some kind of hot source for no nonsense scientific journalism. Thanks...

    (Did you even see the dick he drew on that guy in the chicken suit? Man's an artist)

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    "before you we rite articles"... I guess you were using a phone? To be honest, if you want serious reporting then this site will probably be a big disappointment. GW just finds interesting stories then writes a silly description and I like it that way.

  • Ye, what he said.

  • Matthew Anderson

    POSITIVE he sounded like THIS!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

  • Impressively drawn outline GW.

  • The Magnificent Newtboy

    Can't unsee...

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