Good Work: Terrorist Suicide Bomb Trainer Blows Up Class

February 12, 2014


A terrorist suicide bomb trainer operating out of Iraq accidentally triggered his live explosive vest, killing himself and 21 other would-be bombers. 'So, you find a large crowd kind of like we have assembled here, then you just push this bu--' KABOOM! Presumably everybody in the class got A's for already knowing how to explode so well.

Just last week a suicide bomber struck a popular falafel shop near the Ministry of Foreign Affairs here, killing several people. On Monday evening Raad Hashim, working the counter at a liquor store near the site of the attack, burst out laughing when he heard the news.

"This is so funny," Mr. Hashim said. "It shows how stupid they are, those dogs and sons of dogs."

More seriously, he said, "it also gives me pain, as I remember all the innocent people that were killed here."

"What happened today was not death, but it was life to us," Mr. Hashim said. "Those 22 who were killed today might have killed hundreds of Iraqis, hundreds of innocent souls. May they burn in hell."

"May they burn in hell." Powerful words. Maybe even as powerful as Expecto Patronum. Did I tell you I finally figured out what my Patronus is? A COBRA. Check this out -- EXPECTO PATRONUM! See? "That's definitely a penis." I was afraid of that.

Thanks to Andreas, who only wishes more suicide bombers had taken this guy's class.

  • The Patriotrocker

    Bomber go BOOM!

  • It's always the class clown that messes with the teachers tools.

  • hans

    I like to think that he hated suicide bombers, so he just killed em all on purpose.

  • Ondrej Petyniak

    extreme case of burning out :)

  • Deksam

    yeah! Score one for peace!

  • FuckBoaz

    I am going to murder people lol

  • Micheal Reeve

    Class... dismissed

  • Guest

    shades: descend

  • fdafda

    obviously he was used to demonstrating that with a dummy vest....which means somebody was tampering with the teaching supplies....which means it must have been a trap.


  • Frédéric Purenne

    HA! Wow... It's not everyday you're happy about human stupidity!

  • SpiralArchitect

    Billy Connoly "Every time there's a bang the world's a Wanker short"
    ...i wann see the instructor... "Right Lads I'm gonna show you this only

  • fdafda

    "So, as a suicide bomber you had training?

    Of course, we had this suicide bomber training camp

    Oh, so is that a nice facility?

    It used to be.... :(

    What happened?

    New guy. The idiot tried to practice."

    -achmed the dead terrorist

  • Guest I'm dead, that means I get my virgins :)
    o_0 are you my virgins? I hope not, theres a bunch of ugly ass guys reading here!

    Did they say it'd only be female virgins?

    holy crap! ;_________;

  • Guest

  • JJtoob

    Did they say if they would be female human virgins?

  • fdafda

    I've been screwed(by a boar and 71 dogs)

  • Shirley - Robert

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    ...i wann see the instructor.

  • Guest

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  • Guest
  • fdafda

    Fighting spam with spam doesn't work this way

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