A drunk woman (above) was police-escorted off a flight bound for Salt Lake City, Utah, from Baltimore, Maryland, after threatening to kill the man sitting next to her for rebuking her advances and refusing to have sex with her. I know, it's hard to believe anybody wouldn't want to lose their mile-high club virginity on a Delta coach class trip from Baltimore to Salt Lake City. That is like, the stuff romance novels are made of. The babies crying, the people coughing, the no free drink or peanuts, a cramped bathroom that smells like ungodly hell from the @$$hole who emptied his intestines into the toilet before you. Yeah, this guy -- what an idiot. I've got the sneaking suspicion those two dudes on the right wouldn't have made the same mistake though. "Must be one of those gays," I imagine them convincing themselves.
Thanks to think of something funny, who isn't just a member of the mile high club, he's the president.