According to a recent study, localizing blasts of ultrasound to different parts of the brain may improve sensory perception (i.e. heightened touch, hearing). It won't make you any better looking though.
"We can use ultrasound to target an area of the brain as small as the size of an M&M," study researcher William Tyler, a neuroscientist at the Virginia Tech Carilion Research Institute, said in a statement. "This finding represents a new way of noninvasively modulating human brain activity with a better spatial resolution than anything currently available."
So ultrasound might be able to heighten the brain's response to external stimuli, that's pretty cool. But what would microwaves do? One aspiring scientist plans to find out! "Don't do it." Too late, I already rigged the microwave to operate without the door closed. Now, as soon as my head hits the rotater plate I want you to hit the popcorn button.
Thanks to Thaylor H, whose brain works so well she actually needs something to dumb it down. PROTIP: booze.