So, It's Come To This: Grumpy Cat Brand Coffee Drinks
Because the world refuses to make sense anymore, Grumpy Cat (real name: Tarder Sauce) is coming out with a line of refrigerated coffee drinks and NOT tarter sauce, which would actually be reasonable considering A) that's her name and B) cats love fish with tarter sauce. From a purely marketing standpoint (WHICH I HOLD A MASTER'S DEGREE IN), this is all wrong. Grumpy cat shouldn't be selling coffee, Grumpy Cat should only be selling things that make people ANGRY, like the bullshit cable and internet bundle I got roped into. Or Grumpy Cat brand customer service. And if Grumpy Cat SHOULD sell coffee, it should be the kind of coffee that gives you diarrhea when you least expect it. Like as soon as you finish washing your hands after going to the bathroom.
Thanks to Claire, Omnicrom, le beeps and PJ, who don't believe in celebrity endorsements, especially not from cats.