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New Cheetah Robot Officially Faster Than Any Human

September 6, 2012 / animals, bad ideas, congratulations?, dammit, DARPA -- you and i need to have some words (mine are mostly gonna be dirty ones!), death, game over man, good lord that is scary, imagine that thing chasing you -- then sign this anti-robotics petition, robotic death army, running, terrifying, uh-oh, video, we're all gonna die, well -- it's been real, wonderful just wonderful, wtf were you thinking, yeah you did

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DARPA's new and improved cheetah robot is officially faster than even the fastest human, making running for your life futile unless you just want to die hot and sweaty.

The world record for the 100 meter dash was set in 2009 by sprinter Usain Bolt, who averaged 23.35 mph during his run for a time of 9.58 seconds. Over one 20-meter stretch, he managed to get up to 27.78 mph. It was a pretty impressive feat.

The cheetah robot can keep a pace at 28.3 mph and peaks at 29.3. That's even faster than my car can go. There's a video of the thing in action after the jump, which every single one of you is going to watch so you finally knock it off with all this "robots are our friends" bullshit. You see this thing run and try to tell me it's our friend -- I dare you.

Hit the jump and be terrified.

Thanks to fat piggie, Brandon, Suz, Jamiroquai (oh shishi you're still around?!), allyson, David and Hambo, who all expressed concern in their emails and are alright in my book.

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There are Comments
  • grimbldoo

    Cheetah is chasing you? Take one step to the side, problem solved.

  • robweeve

    kind of like a chicken with its head cut off

  • Sounds like my headboard... O.o

  • McfeelySmackup

    I don't mean to be the guy who just rips into every accomplishment...bu how impressive is it when the thing is being held in place by an arm.

    It's in no way "running", it's moving its legs at a speed that approximates that of the treadmill...it's not even supporting it's own weight.

  • jimmy

    Whys everyone so scared of this? It can't climb stairs OR open doors! We're perfectly safe! ...for now...

  • you think it cares about your silly ass door.....itl just charge through the door!

  • When will these guys design something for riding!?

  • JimmyThr

    So this is what's going to be chasing us in the post-apocalyptic wasteland

  • MaxwellMudd

    I kind of reminds me of the humping USB dog.

  • ZomBBombeR

    I couldn't see the parts falling off but it's showing up super low res on my screen so that could be why either way, even if this thing was self sufficient and didn't need a stablizing arm and external power etc I wouldn't be too worried as it looks like traditonal lead ammo would rip straight through that thing.
    Edit#1 scratch that I saw the part and it looks to be a bolt from the underside of it and can be seen between 13-14 sec mark.

  • I'm torn...on one hand its a killer robot that runs fast than me...on the other its a big ol kitteh

  • great now keep the binary code kill all humans away from the damn thing.

  • Guest

    ..Did something fall off at 0:14?

  • Guest

    Maybe it would run faster if it wasn't doing it backwards. haha XD

  • Am I the only one who saw parts fall off at 13 seconds? Look on the treadmill near his front legs and watch from 13-17 seconds, you'll see it.

  • Tim

    I thought that at first too, but you can see briefly if you pause the video before that the object actually is flung towards the robot and then is kicked back by the foot.

  • Null

    Like Forest Gump but evil

  • Chris Roberts

    you guys aren't seeing the bigger picture!! when this thing gets off the treadmill we are all doomed.

  • it cant run for shit across uneven ground so this things chasing you get the hell off the road and your perfectly fine not to mention ist still taking orders/energy from that huge ass budle of wires

  • spline

    Yeah, the prototypes of BigDog were wired and on an arm too. About a year after that, they were hossing through the woods, and over rocks and snow, totally independently. Just you fucking wait...

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