Binge-Drinking College Students Happier And "More Socially Satisfied" Than Those Who Don't Booze As Hard

August 21, 2012


Worst party ever: Sixty people, ONE Miller Lite.

According to a recent study performed by Colgate University (of minty fresh breath fame), heavy drinking college students are happier and more "socially satisfied" (sexed?) than those who practice moderation. Me? I didn't really start drinking hard until AFTER I got my undergrad (I have a master's too, WTF!) and I've been pretty miserable ever since. Definitely no social status. Well, unless pariah counts.

Colgate University associate professor of sociology Carolyn Hsu, who co-authored the study, says that, despite being aware of the ills associated with binge drinking, students continue to overdo their alcoholic consumption because of a link between binge drinking and improved social status.

That part is not particularly surprising, but what the authors did find intriguing was that low-status students were able to elevate their social satisfaction to the level of high-status students by binge drinking. Additionally, students who belonged to high-status groups were less socially satisfied if they did not binge drink.

Also of interest is that the majority of the 64 percent who claimed to be binge drinkers, most were mimicking the behavior of high-status group members in order to elevate their social status.

Drinking to be cool, huh? That isn't a new concept. Or a good one. Listen: if you want to be cool you only need one thing: confidence. Confidence, and a REALLY cool party trick (I guess technically that's two things). Oh man, I used to do this bit where I'd pull a wooden nickel from behind a girl's ear after showing her that my hands were empty. They ate that one up! "It never worked, did it?" No :( I was always so busy spraying cologne down my pants before the party started I'd forget to bring my nickel.

Thanks to Mary and LupusYonderboy, who agree the key to being happy in college is good grades and the outlook of a bright future! Oooooooor getting high and hosting Mario Kart tournaments.

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy


  • Danja

    Women become sluts and men become legendary and everyone "looks up to them" for doing it. I dated a girl who was stuck in her college party days. I didn't like her because of her drinking, but because of the person she was. Unfortunately, she continued to drink like alcohol would not exist after that night, and that is where our problems started.

    So these people may be happier, but more successful? I personally don't think so. Try working a 60+ hr a week job while binge-drinking the entire time. Wont be long until you're drinking solo at home with no job.

  • Shaun9lives

    There may be a correlation between drinking and lowered sexual inhibitions, but alcohol doesn't turn women into sluts. That sounds like something Todd Akins would say. Plenty of healthy, self respecting women enjoy going out and having a good time with friends.

    Regarding success, I have no empirical data (I'd be interested to see some.) However, anecdotally, I've noticed a high correlation between social drinking and high performing young adults. I drank like a fish in undergrad and graduated with honors. A lot of my peers did too. I'm now in my third year at a first-tier law school, where everyone was top 10% of his or her undergrad class, and there is A LOT of drinking.

    It's the work hard / party hard mentality. It's something I don't think many of us can, or should carry into old age, at least without toning it down some. But for students and young professionals social drinking is a great way relax, socialize, and network.

    I'm not saying everyone needs to drink, or that drinking will make everyone successful, and I don't want ignore those who have serious alcohol problems. I just want to point out that social drinking seems to work pretty well for a lot of people.

  • jackattack

    The ultimate social status elevation definitely comes from having confidence that you can drink everyone else under the table

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    binge-drinking college students also have a higher dropout and failure rate.

  • Shaun9lives


  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    if you would get off redtube and look around the internetz for awhile you can find them. pick any search engine that you would like. every study shows identical results.

  • n_a_a_s

    Soooo...... no source then, just an opinion from someone who probably regrets dropping out amirite?

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    I actually have a MS in Information Technology Management. I don't understand why I have to go and pull all the scientific data that is readily available for anyone to find and post it here because certain individuals have no concept of how Google or Bing work.

    fyi....Harvard is just one of the sources...but I guess they don't know what they are talking about either.

  • the antagonist

    So, basically you got nothing. Well, other than reinforcing negative IT guy stereotypes.

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    and you are just a sad little troll.

    here....let me hold everyone's hand. start with this page. if you don't think the results meet your intellectual needs then please feel free to interject your own search term.

  • Meg

    You're my hero. /no sarcasm

  • n_a_a_s

    NOT FAIR.... nobody cool uses Bing. You made a statement that requires data to back it up otherwise it's just your opinion ;)

  • BillGatesIsYourDaddy

    If people are too stupid to take a little initiative and show some drive and purpose in life and learn for themselves then I say THANK GOD for binge drinking because maybe they will take themselves out of the gene pool and that can be their one contribution to society.

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