Math, The Language Of Love: Heart Equation
Want to give that special lady something without actually spending any coconuts? Make her a heart with your graphing calculator! Tell her it's your heart. Tell her in high school you traded it to a wizard that lives in your calculator in exchange for not failing Calculus but you've since repaid your debt to the wizard by hooking him up on a date with a protractor. Tell her now you want her to have your heart. But, WARNING: she's probably gonna cry. Get it? Because you're a f***ing liar and a cheapskate!
Thanks to grizz, who agrees you should still send all your bros the BatEquation today.