A newly developed x-ray laser at the SLAC National Acceleration Laboratory has been able to produce temperatures as hot as 3.6-million degrees Fahrenheit, or, in layman's terms, really f***ing toasty. Definitely not the kind of laser you'd want to jokingly wave your hand in front of during an experiment.
By focusing rapid-fire pulses from the beam on a piece of aluminum foil thinner than spider's silk, they were able to create a material known as hot dense matter.
Hot dense matter is some of the most extreme material in the universe, only existing in the hearts of stars and giant gas planets. Having a sample of it in the lab should provide insights into the material, helping scientists to create better models of its behavior.
Speaking of hot dense matter... "What're you trying to imply -- your penis?" No, I'm not. That thing is as cold as a freezy-pop and -- what's the opposite of dense? Loose? It's cold and loose. See? Just fell off and shattered. Fun fact: all the king's horses and all the king's men have stopped returning my calls. I wonder how fast a 3.6-million degree laser could cook a chicken breast. Because my money's on the microwave.
Thanks to Richard Cranium, who -- I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE. It took a minute, but I see.