You're Gonna Die: Zombie Survival Kit In A Bottle
This is the Zombie Bottle, a zombie apocalypse survival kit in a
shotgun bottle. The kit contains a 6" braining spike, ear plugs (because why would you want to hear them coming?), a wound cleansing kit, two band-aids, a chocolate candy and a now-broken bottle. $15 gets you two kits, effectively doubling your chances of survival to almost 5%.
Thanks to Chris, whose zombie apocalypse survival plan consists entirely of tying other peoples' shoe laces together.