Crappy Alien Themed Brothel Coming Soon
That sad old pervert (Dennis Hof) who owns the Moonlight BunnyRanch brothel in Nevada has decided to open a new alien themed whorehouse because his regular prosties aren't doing it for him anymore. "They need to be green and wearing those glitter antennas", I imagine he said to himself while climaxing to The Wrath of Khan.
[Hof] recently bought a rundown bordello 90 miles northwest of Las Vegas and unveiled plans to renovate and reopen it with a science fiction theme [...] It's all an attempt to cash in on the property's location just south of the federal installation formerly known as the Nevada Test Site -- though nowhere near the actual Area 51.
...But who cares about sex when there are costumes designed by Hof's partner, tabloid fixture Heidi Fleiss?
Hof's alien theme is already well past the probing stage, but important details -- whether the working women will be painted green, for example -- are still being decided [...] It's unclear whether the costumes will be for everyday use or for promotional events and special occasions.
$20 says it has wood paneling. Another $20 says 3 out of 4 blindfolded patrons could identify the smell of the place as sadness infused with green body paint mixed with a Star Trek convention and Astroglide. Mmmm, space lube.
Thanks to Jackie, who agrees there better be that three-tittied alien chick from Total Recall or GTFO.