520-Day Mission To Mars Simulation (AKA Sit In A Dark Trailer) Has Been Completed
Let's take another one -- this time with less eagle hands.
An international team of mock astronauts emerged from their windowless trailer "spaceship" yesterday after being locked away for 520-days during a simulated flight to Mars and back. Damn, a spaceship with wood paneling -- now that's future technology. God, did you have to shit in a bucket too?
The all-male crew could only shower once a week, ate canned food and received emails on a delay, depending on how "far away" they are from Earth. Their living quarters are the size of a bus and, outside of a quick stint on mock Mars, they've spent two eight-month periods in total confinement.
But Patrik Sundblad, the human life sciences specialist at the ESA, says the simulation has proved a complete success. "Yes, the crew can survive the inevitable isolation that is for a mission to Mars and back," Sundblad stated. "Psychologically, we can do it."
520 days locked in a shitty bus with five other dudes? Do you think they, you know, started messing around with each other like in prison? Because I would have, ON DAY ONE. Well guys, it looks like we're gonna be stuck together for awhile, this is my wiener.
Thanks to Matt G, blake and Jugo91, who agree it's completely different when you're actually up there floating in a tin can and can't just chop down a door with an axe and be all "HEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY!"