For The Ladies (Actually, For Nobody): Nail Polish Inspired By Bruises And Periods
Because of all the vampire shit going around, blood (NOT SNOT) is like sooooooo in right now. And what better way to cash in on the venous craze than a line of blood-inspired fingernail polishes? "I can think of a lot of things." Oh, right, RON POPEIL, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
"Inspirations and references range from the vampiric gradations of a healing bruise; the moody rusts of menstrual blood..."
Respectively the colors described above are called Gradation of a Bruise...and Menstrual Last Day. And they don't apply like your average nail polish either.
"Not quite transparent, the effect is fluid and semi opaque, as if the nail itself had taken on a mysterious life of its own."
But seriously, how are you and I gonna make some money off this whole vampire thing? "I dunno --writing sensual, yet comic, vampire fiction?" OMG -- THAT'S A GREAT IDEA!
Vampire Victor nibbled a dame's neck tenderly -- he could tell she was enjoying herself. But he wanted to turn up the heat a bit before taking the plunge (and by taking the plunge here I mean biting her neck and turning her into a vampire -- NOT sex). Then, he went for an over-the-bra titty feel. She was receptive. He tried to undo it in the back with one hand but wasn't having much luck. He could tell she was judging him. GOD, WOMEN CAN BE SO JUDGEY ,the Geekologie Writer thought to himself.
"Wait -- I thought this was about Vampire Victor?" Oh yeah, I knew that.
I first locked eyes on Vampire Victor in the changing room of the health club...
Thanks to maria, who prefers loogie and bile inspired shades. JK JK SHE'S A FANCY LADY.