Seen here looking suspiciously like nori sushi paper, compostable bikinis (not to be confused with dissolving bikinis or me at a swim-up bar in a banana hammock), are just that: bikinis that will break down in a compost pile. Other things that will break down in a compost pile: me. *sobbing* GOD, WHY DON'T MORE PEOPLE CARE ABOUT THE EARTH, MAN?! *blowing snot bubbles* WE'RE F***IN' KILLING IT.
Eco-luxury (?) designer Linda Loudermilk created these designs using a special fabric made from plant starch, and while you can wear it just like a normal swimsuit (out in the sun all day, in the water, etc.), it'll break down completely within 180 days if you bury it in your backyard. It's also supposed to be cheap enough to be practically disposable, which is handy for an article of clothing that disposes in such a friendly way.
Well it's about time, amirite? Do you know how many landfills are overflowing with noncompostable bikinis? Literally zero. And that's literally zero too many, folks. Remember: put a couple bricks in your toilet tank to conserve water. Unless turds stop flushing, in which case that is like WAAAAAAY more important.
Hit the jump for a skimpier version.
Thanks to Kirk, who thought all bikinis were compostable. No Kirk, that's combustible. Huge difference. Now let's burn some bras.