Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial Hedonistica

July 24, 2011 - July 30, 2011 Archives

  • July 29, 2011
    Let's face it: we all want to be shot out a cannon when we die. But cannons can be expensive to rent, and you don't want your family stuck with that financial burden. "Who gives a shit about them, I'm the one that died! They should respect my wishes." Haha, I'm with you. B... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    This is a picture of a luxury car pileup in Monaco. It makes me sad and happy at the same time because 1. it's always sad to see something beautiful get damaged *eyes own battle-scarred face in mirror* but 2. I have a thing against insanely rich people. "Oh you jelly, GW?" D... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    It's not like anybody who's ever blind taste-tested them alongside Crayolas would need any more evidence, but here's a photo that helps explain why off-brand crayons suck so bad. Apparently they're made with...I dunno, people? Yeah, plus they make me color outside the lines! ... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    Hot on the costumed-heels of yesterday's London cosplayers lip-syncing to that one booboo-ass song, here comes another, this time from the San Diego Comic-Con of cosplayers lip-syncing to an equally annoying ear-bleeder. The deeper meaning of a bunch of people dressed-up as th... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    Apple, a company best known for its popular Apple II computer system during the 80's (right?), officially has more cash lying around than the US government. Uncle Sam? No -- Uncle Jobs. Haha, what do you mean, "I want YOU"? Moooooooom -- your brother's being weird again! A... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    This is Optimus Prime carved into a watermelon. Or is it a watermelon carved into Optimus Prime? "Neither, that's a cantaloupe." Can't elope?! But we love each other and our families are feuding! "Did you really just...I hope you feel shame for even typing that." I do, I ... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    Note: Picture unrelated but creepy as fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu. Because there is a such thing as evil mad scientists, a group of researchers at the California Institute of Technology claim they've created "an artificial neural network out of DNA molecules and that it can answer que... / Continue →
  • July 29, 2011
    That's a lot of heads. The world population hit six-billion in 1999 and now, a scant 12 years later, we're set to break seven later this year. That's, uh, that's moving pretty quick. Like trying to put your hand on a woman's leg as soon as she shows up for your eHarmony da... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    The title says it all. It's a well-made 15-minute Batman fan film that Geekologie Reader Alex U.'s friends made. It's got everything: costumes, decent cinematography, special effects, stunts, and choreographed fight scenes. Plus a twist ending! Now I don't want to ruin it f... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    Clouds: sometimes they look like dinosaurs. Other times they might look Yoda, Jabba the Hutt or a viking ship. And even OTHER times, they look like this this. A unique formation some meteorologists want to classify as a new type of cloud, and give a name. Give a name -- h... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    [Note to self: remember to delete this tomorrow] So the server spazzed out last night and the last backup was Tuesday afternoon but we've managed to repopulate all of yesterday's eight missing posts (from sea to shining sea the Navy Laser/Gun combo to the Wet Water Homoerotic ... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    Note: Slightly larger version HERE in case you're at McDonalds right now and struggling to connect to the internet to read Geekologie. But I know that's not the case, because then how would be reading this? "On my phone, dummy." Damn you rude! This is the instruction card p... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    This is "bioartist" Jae Rhim Lee wearing her 'Mushroom Death Suit', which, despite the misleading name, is NOT a costume from the Super Mario franchise. No, it was designed to decompose a human body after death by consuming it with growing shiitake and oyster mushrooms. Alter... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    Note: Yesterday's posts are slowly being repopulated throughout the day. GO GET YOU SOME. This is a homemade music video to P!nk's (what the -- when did you get a ! in your name -- was that always there? Kidding, I don't care) 'Raise Your Glass' which consists entirely of co... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    Roongrojna Sangwongprisarn (damn I'd hate having to write that on top of all my homework), the 54-year old proprietor of Thailand's four Ko Art Shops (that specialize in custom scrap metal creations, because you can do that now), went and built himself a tetanus-laden alien (al... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    Combing the power of swarm-bots and quadrocopters -- what could possibly go wrong? SPOILER: For humanity? Everything. And now autonomous swarm-bots are capable of producing a mobile landing platform for quadrocopters with no communication with each other or the copter. WTF!... / Continue →
  • July 28, 2011
    If you haven't noticed because you don't read every day AND OUGHT TO BE PRETTY DAMN ASHAMED OF YOURSELF, the server decided to blow chunks late last night and the eight most recent articles are all over the floor by the toilet. Not sure if we're gonna be able to paper-towel th... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    There are two kinds of fun in the world: 1. the kind that involves playing Water Soaked Knee Hockey, and 2. drugs and alcohol [Editor's note: you can't say that, GW] 2. loose women [Editor's Note: that either] 2. doing something illegal [Editor's Note: last chance] 2. the kind ... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    You do realize that thing's just a lock of hair, drop of blood and piece of worn clothing away from a functional voodoo doll of yourself, right? Are you in the market for a creepy 3-D printed 20" Barbie doll of yourself? Because guess what? You're also in the market for a mout... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    Please, no 'the cake is a lie' comments. This is a very impressive looking 'Space Core' personality core cake from Portal 2 commissioned by Flickr users sharkhats, who were celebrating their 3-year wedding anniversary. It was created by Mike's Amazing Cakes in Redmond, Washing... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    No, you don't. And this is why. Because they're f***ing terrifying. A very short list of other things you don't want to see in real life: a friend's asshole in the locker-room because they have shallow buttcheeks and bent over to pick up a towel. Now I know right now you might ... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    Note: very worthwhile video is after the jump. This is a video of an expert explaining a pair of entirely-mechanical automaton 'Singing Bird' pistols (MADE ALMOST 200 YEARS AGO AROUND 1815!!) that recently sold at a Christie's auction for just short of $6-million. Unfortunate... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    This is the £5,000,000 (~$8.2M) dino bone/diamond & gold "History Edition" iPad 2 from purveyors of gaudy, ungodly expensive shit, Stuart Hughes. Presumably it's just a mock-up though because you'd have to be preeeeeetty f***ing stupid to have already made one of something tha... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    This is a stunningly stunning replica of an N7 assault rifle that doesn't exist yet but probably will in Mass Effect 3. It was constructed by propmaster extraordinaire Harrison Krix of Volpin props. I don't know about you guys, but I'm already pretty f***ing excited about ME3 c... / Continue →
  • July 27, 2011
    The Navy, always looking for a more terrifying weapon, and a few good men "That's the Marines, moron." Oh. Let me start over. The Navy, who apparently doesn't accept contract kills by email even if you cleverly use an official looking email address like AdmiralGW.gov@gmail, is... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    YOOOOOOOU SHALLNOT PASS! Want to watch a 45-minute guided tour of the Middle Earth a bunch of guys recreated in Minecraft? Haha, you already cancelled your Netflix subscription didn't you? I don't blame you. For busting ass in the elevator, yes. Plus I will never forgive. ... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    Check your bank account. Are you richer than God? Damn share the wealth brobro, I thought we were tight! Me? My bank account is empty. My pockets too. The shoebox under my bed? Nothing but a buttplug. Which, back in the day, used to actually get you something. Now it d... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    Planking: this guy wins it. I don't want to see another f***ing picture. Idiot morons and manholes: they don't mix. According to 21-year old liar Jared Medeiros, he was attacked by gang members while walking home after drinking (BUT NOT DRUNK!) at 2AM, and they stole his wal... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    This is a video of DJ Sures and his homemade robotic friend WALL-E because, presumably, he doesn't have any actual human friends. Hey, neither do I, but you don't see me building robots, do you?! No, you don't. But you may catch me talking to stuffed animals. Also: myself o... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    Oh man, remember back during the Cold War when spies had guns hidden in pretty much everything? Me neither, WE WEREN'T EVEN BORN YET. But I have seen a lot of James Bond movies and my God is that one handsome spy. If he pressured me for information I'd tell him everything he... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    A massive and very, very wet black hole was recently discovered by asstronomers (you have no idea the amount of shame I live with), and is currently categorized as both the largest AND farthest water source in the known universe. And, since it's only 30-billion-trillion miles ... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    According to a recent study (OR POSSIBLE GOVERNMENT CONSPIRACY), time travel is effectively impossible as a result of photons being unable to travel faster than light. But what about photons shot out of a cannon? "You're an idiot." Am I? *staring into laser beam* By prov... / Continue →
  • July 26, 2011
    A 21-year old Chinese couple WITH THREE CHILDREN sold them all to afford their internet cafe gaming addictions. The first child fetched less than $500, while the second two netted almost $4,600. No word what was wrong with the first one. The couple was turned in after Li Lin... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    This is a gallery of the cosplaying ladies from this weekend's San Diego Comic-Con. Per tradition, Norman from over at Comic Vine goes and takes a shit-ton of pictures and is kind enough to lend me some for your viewing pleasure. This year he really outdid himself with a whop... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    The Wrongulator is a cheap $7 solar calculator that's been programmed with bad logic to only give wrong answers. I'm not sure how close the bad answers are to the correct ones, but hopefully close enough so that the error isn't obvious. That, or just 80085 every time. What? ... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    If there was ever a time to go over a waterfall in a barrel, this is it. This is a video of a waterfall in southern Australia being battered by 75MPH winds and turning it into a water-rise. Get it? Because rise is the opposite of fall! Or is that spring? "Cut it out, GW." ... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    Seen here looking suspiciously like nori sushi paper, compostable bikinis (not to be confused with dissolving bikinis or me at a swim-up bar in a banana hammock), are just that: bikinis that will break down in a compost pile. Other things that will break down in a compost pile... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    I heard there's about to be a job opening in the title-writing department. Sensational headlines: sometimes reporters go too far. Or are just f***ing idiots. "Like you." Yes, like me. Granted the boiling point of water IS 100°, it's just 100° Celsius AND NOT FAHRENHEIT (... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    In news that shouldn't surprise anyone who agrees there's never enough research into the long term effects of new technologies (ahem, microwaves) before they're implemented, a recent study funded by Samsung indicates 3-D content causes eye fatigue and strain. Wow, didn't see t... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    Note: Fuller-res version HERE because I heard you wore a wizard hat to Deathly Hallows Part II for the third time this weekend. Is this what Harry Potter would look like as anime? Yes. Even if it isn't let's just say it is because I've only written three lines about it and I... / Continue →
  • July 25, 2011
    Hell no it's not safe -- YOU COULD GO BLIND. The Viberect (I would've opted for Digjiggler) is a recently FDA-approved vibrator for men. It ranks high on the list of "things on my nightstand I don't want to explain", second only to the shrunken head voodoo talisman. Basicall... / Continue →
  • July 24, 2011
    Note: Full-res version HERE because this is like, really really mportant. This is a graphical representation made by Mashable of Apple's 35-year product history, all in the shape of a tree (NOT bush). It kind of reminds me of those Jack & the Beanstalk vines Mario (link is ho... / Continue →
  • July 24, 2011
    Barg, Brad and kw -- congratulations guys, you're today's big winners! Although truthfully, it was probably Tokyoflash that came out on top what with the exposure and all. Exposure, LOL *flashes mammies* So yeah, somebody else send me something cool to give away. Preferably ... / Continue →