If it can tear a hole in space just imagine what it could do to an ass!
Seen here (but not really because it doesn't exist yet) looking suspiciously like staring down the barrel of a Portal gun, a new ultra-superlaser capable of tearing the very fabric of space-time (and exposing its black hole) has been approved by the European Commission. This...sounds dangerous. It also sounds like I did a great job with the Portal/tearing of space-time connection. PUZZLE PIECES, BABY: I
PUT THEM TOGETHER eat them.
At peak power, the fourth laser in Europe's Extreme Light Infrastructure project (or ELI) will combine ten beams into a single pulse measuring 200 petawatts. 200 petawatts is significantly more power that our entire race generates at any given moment, and in fact more total power than Earth receives from the sun.
The 200 petawatt pulses will only last 1.5 x 10^-14 second, which is about the same amount of time that it takes for light to travel from one side of a human hair to the other, if you shave the hair down by 90%.
The hope is that a laser this powerful might actually be able to tear apart the vacuum of space-time itself, revealing the matter and antimatter underneath.
Holy smokes! Destroying the universe aside, I do love me some Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation. So, for the moment, I'm behind this laser. Literally -- and fake humping it. Quick, take a picture! "Say cheese." PEWPEWPEW!
Thanks to Candace and alex, who agree every planet has got to blow itself up eventually.