Mar 25 2011Reader, You Are...NOT The Father: Scientists Successfully Create Lab-Grown Sperms


The race: you lost it.

In one of the first steps to rid the world of dudes, a group of feminist (no, not really) Japanese scientists have successfully grown mice sperm (I thought they looked like mice!) in the laboratory. Me? I only grow weed in the laboratory. Kidding! Totally in my closet.

...they hope to be able to do the same for humans in the not-too-distant future. They say it could be used to "aid prepubescent boys about to undergo cancer therapies that destroy fertility. It could also protect the reproductive potential of endangered animals that might die before reaching sexual maturity, he adds.

Fun fact: did you know sexual position can affect your chances of getting pregnant? It's true. But it does NOT affect the sex of the baby. That all depends on the day of the week!

Researchers successfully grow working sperm cells in a lab [dvice]

Thanks to Jordan and special k, who agree every sperm in that picture deserves a purple 'participant' ribbon for their effort.

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Reader Comments

yah! now lets race them

You're assuming I was getting laid anyway.

Soon enough we'll have the worlds first homunculi and then we are all fucking doomed. God damn scientists.

oh and first? maybe?

Hey GW! how come your website goes on EST? don't you live on the west coast now?

I'm in agreement with @1. If science can make it, mankind can turn it into:
1) a sport.
2) a drinking game.
3) both.

____ __ .' o `.
/~----,\___/,--.`- ,_\.'
`-----' `---'`


______ ___.' o `.
/~----,\___/,--. ,_ |
`-----' `---'`

Ascii art Fail- I was trying to do a sperm :(

@5 Well hopefully it doesn't end up like most Amurican races: Turn left, turn left, turn left...wait for it... omg! he turned left.

@9: Hey! I saw that Jeff Dunham skit, too.

noooooo were obsolete now! i always thought i was special becuase i broke through the condom and beat a million other sperms

@8 Not sure how that even resembles a sperm but cool.
@3 Whats a homunculi?

Yay! who needs men I hate them !!

tss...tss...@13 so like how you sex stuff? tss...tss...

@5 I vote #2 ;-)

mow mow

I am a complete douchebag. Remember me from now on as the biggest douche ever.

mow mow

@12 There are many different definitions of the word, but I think he meant the version that defines a homonculus as a fake or artificial dinner.

@17 Thanks. So he's afraid that scientists are going to create an artificial dinner out of sperm? Sorry I'm so daft...

Where my religious nuts at? We need some hate here.

@19. This is utter blasphemy! You sinners shall all go to hell! You are playing God! This abomination will not be tolerated by the Lord! Evolution didn't happen! Etc.

Whats the idea of creating sperm of an animal that doesnt reach aldulthood? if that example of the animal is not strong enough to survive, why the fuck would you want its offspring??????? TO SAVE SPECIES?? OR TO DOOM THEM WITH A DAMN FUCKING DNA THAT ASSURES THEY WILL DIE??? or now you're gonna tell me that animal dies because some weird unknown illness attacked it and was not well fed so it couldnt fight the illness??? or maybe it didnt have a good inmune system to fight it because its DNA DOES NOT HAVE THAT INFORMATION?

It's called fucking natural selection dumbass scientist! what makes you think that you can correct nature deciding certain animal should live although it died?

if i new sperm was so valuable that it needs to be farmed I probably wouldn't leave so much of it in wadded up kleenex's next to the keyboard.

@18 wow.. That was a fail. I should really proof read what I type. I meant to say human* but somehow I typed dinner lol

@24 Best lol all day. Thanks.

@24 - freud says somebody's hungry for spunk.

Pretty much any of you that comment here qualify as lab grown sperm.

Having a serious deja vu here! Anyway, @ Shelbon thanks, you just made my morning!

Hmm....I don't agree with this.

1: if the universe decides that it doesn't want you reproducing then its for a good reason.

I do not personally liek this. This is only going to encourage some girls to remain unmerried and boyfreind-free. How can guys like me find true love with stuff like this coming out?

$8857757349397476 for whoever takes Julian Assange's stem cells to them.

there will be a new agency for child support.

Wikileaks indeed.

@21 gtfo we already artificially inseminate animals, the difference is basically negligible.

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