You'll Never Be An Exterminator!: Man Blows Himself Up Trying to Kill A Spider For Wife
Because stupid people hurting themselves really tickles my fancy, here's a story about some jackass who blew himself up in the bathroom trying to kill a spider. Come on maine, haven't you ever heard of a shoe?!
The 28 year-old suffered severe burns after attacking the arachnid with an aerosol can at his home in Clacton in Essex.
The man was summoned by his wife to deal with a spider she had seen scuttling behind the lavatory on Bank Holiday Monday. Not being able to reach it, the man decided to kill it by spraying it with the can.
However he was unable to see whether it was dead because the bulb in the bathroom light had blown. At this point he turned to a cigarette lighter to illuminate the room, but in the process ignited the gas fumes and caused an explosion.
The blast was so strong it blew the man off his feet and lifted the loft door off its hinges.
He suffered flash burns to his head, legs and torso and was rushed by ambulance to hospital after dousing himself in cold water.
Granted this guy is MENSA material compared to Electric Nips, but still. Haven't you ever heard of masking the smell of a numero dos by lighting a match? And have you ever heard of someone dropping it between their legs before all the gas trapped in the bowl has dissipated? What happened? Exactly, they blasted off like a rocket and fought a towel bar with their face. Been there, done that, six stitches and an Owen Wilson nose, amirite?!
Thanks to Ash, who kills spiders the old fashioned way: tearing their legs off one by one and then letting them starve to death. WOW. Also, my apologies to anybody who's itching now because of the picture. I couldn't help myself!