Aug 30 2010Not Cool: Frightening Robot Demonstration

nono-robot.jpg

This is a short video demonstrating Vecna Robotics' B.E.A.R. (Battlefield Extraction-Assist Robot). It was allegedly designed to help carry wounded soldiers off the battlefield, but the video also shows its skill at smashing through doors, breaking car windows, lifting weights, picking up missiles and -- AND -- transforming/rolling out. Truly frightening. Reminds me of that scene in Forrest Gump where Lieutenant Dan gets his legs shot off in Vietnam and tells Forrest to leave him but Forrest won't because he's a stupid jerk and can't even respect a man's last wishes. THANKS A LOT, SIMPLETON. I'm so mad right now I could pack dat ass full of your own cocktail shrimp.

Hit the jump for a video of operation Shock 'n Awe Dismember in action (also available in HD!).

Vecna Technologies Official Site
and
Youtube

Thanks to Jay, kitimatdude, Jose and frogmanandy, who would rather crawl in pain than be dragged by a robot in comfort.

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Reader Comments

Is this the same model that puts the condom on for you?

IT'S JOHNNY FIVE!!!

It's cheaper to just get new soldiers.

Lol 0:45

Life is like a box of robots. Ya never know what you're gonna get.

that thing is amazing... just never integrate AI into it. Please.

I don't understand what the guy lightly punching it at 0:42 is supposed to demonstrate. Lol.

Shit happens, that should be on a t-shirt or somethin'. Also, I'm not even afraid of a robot apocalypse but this scared the shit out of me

In the first picture, it looks like the robot is face fucking that guy.

at 0:13 its rescuing a bag of kittens.

Also, lol @ picture, robot bj.

Look @ 0.42 seconds. Some guy attempts to punch it. WTF was he trying to prove? He's a douche bag.

spread the word!

@1 No, you are getting this one confused with a robot of the same name. That one is B.E.A.R. (Battlefield Erection-Assist Robot). You don't want to get them confused when it comes to who you're gonna trust with your Jimmy.

oh great, a robot that can break into my car and drag me away to his robot lair

Ha! I love how it gently turns the door knob then smashes through the door....

I mean, it's cool and all...

But for a robot named Bear, I saw less foraging for berries and grubs, hibernating, and savage maulings than I would have expected.

Hear that Vecna Technologies? You've got some misconceptions about bears, and I've got some ideas and reasonable rates. Call me.

Oh look, the terminator T-1 has been made

See ya after judgement day

All's well assuming the battle is among humans. And @17: Holy $hit you are right!

I love how it needs a harness to attempt some of these feats!!! It's more like C.O.R.K.Y. than BEAR.
" I'm gonna burmn down da' house! "
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NIPPLEZ

@dumb people when the guy punches it, its standing on its treads showing its balance, also as 0:15 turn knob, plow through door!

The company is named after Vecna the evil undead wizard?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vecna

This can't end well.

That Right @ 2... Number 5 is Alive!!!

Now where's the sidekick of Johnny 5? You know, the Indian dude?

Wow!!! I wish I had a robot that just rolled around breaking shit and being badass. When it carries the guy near the car and its arm is infront of its face, it makes it look like it's pissed.

bear...how cute for such an obviously evil thing xD

Terminator v0.001a

that looked super lame, or maybe its just the music influencing my opinion :l

28 comments and no "Bear Calvary!"

Well... I'm not sure if I should be happy or worried when the robot apocalypse comes to be.... Will it help us against its robotic bretherin or will it just smash our brains out like the door and car window?

I absolutely fudging hate however writes for these. Man, you're cheesy.. And not even in a funny way. Shuddup.

and you just said fudging

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