Awh -- Don't Be So Hard On Yourself, Mario
Relax, they're bad guys, bro. They work for Bowser. They're not even worth burying. God, if I beat myself up every time I stomped an enemy I'd be in the ICU all the f***ing time. And not just because I like the pudding, but I did contact the food distributor and they won't sell to individuals. Long story short: I want you to stab me with this ninja sword. But only deep enough so they keep me over the weekend. Oh shit, wait -- help me install my catheter first. Huh? What's it look like -- it's a McDonald's straw. Now on the count of three I want you to jab it in my penis like a Capri Sun.
Mario [maneggs]
via
Mario Cartoon [thedailywh.at]
Thanks to Allo and Kake, who would have dug up that goomba and stolen his wallet. Damn -- ya'll cold!
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This is a little series of pictures drawn by artist H. Caldwell Tanner imagining some alternative career choices Mario could have made to make rescuing the princess easier. The last one is the best but you're gonna have to hit the jump to see it because, well, I need the click... / Continue →
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Some of you whippersnappers may be too young to remember the awesomeness that was the Super Mario Bros. Super Show, a 52-episode series that come out in '89. But I do, because it was on tv, and tv was my only friend (plus on Fridays there were Zelda cartoons!). Wrestling fa... / Continue →
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Note: MUST-SEE video after the jump has a couple (literally, a couple) dirty words. This is an incredibly well made trailer for The Brothers Mario, a make-believe Mario game in the style of a Grand Theft Auto. Admittedly, I'd play the hell out of it. Also, the skin flute pro... / Continue →
