Jul 23 2010Vading Don't Pay Like It Used To: Masked & Caped Darth Vader Robs Long Island Bank


Following a string of Galactic lay-offs, Darth Vader was spotted robbing a bank on Long Island yesterday. But, instead of Force-chokes and a lightsaber, the Vade was rocking a pistol. Not kosher, Darth.

A customer started to battle Vader inside the bank.

Det. Sgt. William Lamb of the Suffolk County Police Department says, "They got into a bit of a physical altercation. No one was hurt."

The Darth Vader thief, described as between 6 feet and 6 feet 2 inches tall, then took off running. In addition to the mask and cape, he was also wearing camouflage pants.

He headed east through the bank's parking lot and then jumped on a bicycle and took off.

Witnesses say his cape was waving behind him as he ran.

A witness said, "I thought it was just a joke but I guess he was serious."

Police have not said if Luke Skywalker has offered to help track "Vader" down.

ROFL @ Luke Skywalker helping. That's some journalistic integrity after my own heart right there. Also, who else knew Vader rode a bicycle? Because I heard he got his license revoked after crashing a speeder bike into a group of Ewoks while all f***ed up on glitterstim. Two words: Celebrity. Rehab.

Crappy news report after the jump.

'Darth Vader' Robs Bank on Long Island [myfoxny]

Thanks to Anthony, Ben, Steven, Jordan, Masami, Galice, Apoorv, VCobra, Matty511, Christoph, Chuck Nunchuck,Lulu and Zaphod Beeblebrox, who would have lightsabered both his arms off and tossed him in the Bantha pit.

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Reader Comments

I wonder if the bike had a bell!


Bank security have to Chase after him? Ironic? I think so.

LMAO! ahahah this is just epic.

Dear new G DUBB,

please die and go to hell because you are a waste of my time.

And f u ck all you people who respond to this comment.


I would have been laughing so hard there is no way I could have given chase.

Long last the robots!

I wonder if the robber spoke like Vader.

there's no way he could see in that mask. Especially run away and ride a bike. The force is strong with this one.

It's Half-Cat!

Did anyone catch that "Officer Lamb" works in "Suffolk County"? lol

Not that I believe GW was replaced. But maybe it was the robots, they finally got to him because of all the anti robot stuff. He's been replaced ghost in the machine...

OMFG LOL! Vader Fail! The camo pants comment made me LOL. Also the Luke Skywalker statement. That's quality journalism!

Yet another reason I love living on Long Island <3

Vader stole my bike!

Darth should of used a lightsaber they're "Not as clumsy or random as a blaster(or a pistol); an elegant weapon for a more civilized age".

Kinda reminds me of this Geekologie article way back. Star Knight!!!


"I just fels a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of dollars were all stolen at once!"

anyone got any more quotes for this?

"I just felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of dollars were all stolen at once!"

anyone got any more quotes for this?

That's no bank, it's a space station!

"you're over confidence is you're weakness." "You're faith in your Vader costume is yours!"

@poop So yeah, seems like there is a new GW but hey the poor guy is trying at least, and shitting on every post won't make him stop, it just makes you look like a moron who dosen't realize his own petty comments go no further then the people who are willing to respond to them. LIKE ME! Hooray!

@25 Perhaps you've never heard of a Troll before. Or if you have, perhaps you haven't quite figured out how to deal with them me thinks.

This guy is epic XD

well now we know how he got to pay for the down payment for the death star.

All too easy

They forgot to mention that you could hear "Vader's" brass balls clanking together as he ran away.

Man, Chad's really fallen on hard times

That glitterstim is a hard habit to kick. He really needed the money for his fix.

damn it i should of looked further down the page!

I guess the empire has hit hard times too.

Video link is fail

expect more, deathstars don't come cheap.

i'd just give him all of the fucking money for having the balls to do that.

Maybe he just wanted to refill the ATM attached to the front of his suit.


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