May 6 2010Pure Genius: A Keyhole For Drunk People


Find yourself perpetually drunk? You might have a drinking problem. Kidding, I'm sure you're fine. But if you ever have trouble getting your key in the door (typically I'd use that as a metaphor for sex-bangin', but not in this case) then you may wanna check this key slut out. Just sayin', she's loose.

A creative keyhole [haha]

Thanks to liquid Tension, who just leaves the door unlocked because he doesn't value his valuables.

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Reader Comments



This is so funny I need to celebrate being 2nd by being 3rd.

Key slut! That's some good writing right there!

As if the key hole itself is not self explanatory there is a little diagram in case your already drunk. Gimme your mouse, don't drink and blog.

I have to get one for those dizzy/double vision nights jajajaja!

If you're drunk so often that you feel the need to go out and spend money on a keyhole like this, then not being able to enter your house after a bender is the least of your problems. Wonk wonk.

I sincerely hope it's called "Keygina!"

Really great idea but... it needs to be upside down so you push the key up...

Why I hear you cry dear readers well RAIN will run down in to the key barrel... so make it 180o the other way and rain can't run in....


Or shape the bottom of the barrel 45o so rain runs out... either way I say it's beta :)

Man, Am I sick or it looks kinda like a pussy? Fuck OFF!

Certainly looks like a vajayjay.

@ 9. It's doggy style key hole.

I need one of those for my car.

Nothing sobers you up quicker than runnin the yellows at 110.

It should also come with a small pillow you could Velcro to the door just above that lock where to drunk will inevitably bang his forehead when he shifts forward to insert the key.

I'm so drunk I read that as ''a keyboard ofr drunk people''./ tad dpestreesing? yes.

that is so fucking awesome, i don't even know where to begin..... just sayin

Old old old. This is not a new invention. In fact they made locks for drunk people in medieval times. I saw it on Rudy Maxa's Europe.

This should come with a checklist of all the things you left the house with, so you don't find out in the morning that you lost your wallet dancing on a table.

This is why one should not have sex drunk. Same sort of issue with incompetence going on there.

I like it, but not really a new invention, the Tudors had these (for Americans, that's just after the middle ages).

@9 Most houses have overhangs, and rain never gets close enough to the door to make it upside down. Besides, if you are so wasted that you need one of these things, the last thing you want to do is hold your arm up while you put the key would get so tiring after a few seconds.

It still won’t stop drunken people from holding the key upside down so they still can't get the door open. Or for the true geniuses, even the right key.

It's only a matter of time before this same design is adapted for underpants.

@13 High five, i agree.

Also, why not make it simple and just get a thumb scanner door?
No rain, no keys, no problem.

Great! Just what I needed- something to not only tell my neighbors that I drink enough to need a keyhole like this, but also that I also usually drive drunk & come home alone, since I didn't have a sober person who could insert the key into the lock for me.

All joking aside, it is a nice looking lock.

O.K. sure... This comes out AFTER the birthday key debacle of '09...and '08....and '07... But just in time for the birthday key fiasco of 2010!

Thank you for saving my binge drinking butt once again

it looks like a bum...just sayin'

well at least it isn't on a car door, it wouldn't help anything...moar deaths on roads with this handy little dvice.

I need one of these for my car.

Actually that concept is quite old. I learned about that from an old German monastery. The monks there were allowed one mug of wine per day - so they went and got themselves 5-liter mugs. That monastery had the same stuff on their old-school-handforged locks. I can't remember the name though. It was somewhere by the river Mosel (the region is famous for it's wines).

Greatest idea, since the invention of Geekologie!

you know drunk people cant own houses! silly.

No one else noticed that the key hole is on the inside of the door?

Look at the latch.

This must be the new "am I too drunk to go out tonight?" test.

@ 32

the lock could be on the outside as well. If the door opens inward the latch is the right way for the look to be on the outside

Where go I get one for my car?

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