Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial Hedonistica

April 25, 2010 - May 1, 2010 Archives

  • May 1, 2010
    NOTE: Video of all the high-flying cupcake action is after the jump. This is a video of a steampunky-looking cannon that was made to shoot cupcakes at people's faces. It's pretty much my dream machine, provided you replace cupcakes with dino genitals. Portland's Kamp Grizzly... / Continue →
  • May 1, 2010
    This is a picture of Mario squeezing Samus's ass. Only thing is, he didn't know he was a she. It's true, I've heard he and Toad have been caught diddling each other behind Peach's castle too. Mario Diggs it, Do You? [kotaku] Thanks to Greg, who took a gamble and grabbed She... / Continue →
  • May 1, 2010
    This is a painting by artist Finch depicting Strawberry Shortcake riding a My Little Pony after killing all the Ninja Turtles. Frightening. And why is there a Rubik's Cube stuck in Leonardo's shoulder? Is that supposed to be some sort of social commentary? Something about p... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    NOTE: Commercial for the WTF You've Got To Be Kidding Me Blanket is after the jump. The Better Marriage Blanket is an actual damn product, officially signaling the end of mankind. Or maybe just flatulence-related divorces! It's basically a comforter with a layer of activated... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    Too late, I alreadly masturbated myself blind! 18 Funny and Geeky T-Shirts [techeblog]... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    This is a designer shower head that was on display at Milan Design Week 2010 that looks like a deer's face. Water comes out of it's mouth and is perfect for the outdoorsy type and furries. But not me. I want a shower head that looks like a woman's face. I also want to pour ... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    I never made it to see Avatar because I was banned from the local theater for trying to sneak one of those beer helmets into the new G.I. Joe, but blah blah blah, boner boner boner. Oh yeah GW, you've still got it. Hit the jump for the uncensored version in case the other F w... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    This is vintage ad for the classiest watch ever made. And that's saying a lot, because I've seen a handpainted one where the minute hand was a phallus. Regardless, every thirty seconds the thing blinks "it's time to f***" and is apparently "a subtle way to break the ice" and ... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    I don't buy it. I know for a fact you'd spend at least half that pie trying convince your girlfriend it's her last chance to have sex before she's "an undead flesh-bag". Which -- God you have a way with words. I'd do you if I were her. Things I Would Do During A Zombie Apoc... / Continue →
  • April 30, 2010
    Gorilla glasses make it appear as if you aren't really looking at what you're looking at (unless you're trying to see your own brain), so gorillas won't kick your ass for making eye contact. They also work for staring at boobs (wear them over x-ray specs). The Rotterdam Zoo ... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    Apparently Japanese scientists have invented a new kind of magical material they've dubbed "elastic water". WTF is elastic water? Not suitable for drinking or spit-takes, that's for sure. Japanese scientists from Tokyo University invented a new substance that consists of 95%... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    Seen here sketching out its plan for human domination in the lunar dust, Japan wants a humanoid robot similar to this one on the moon by 2015. Oh yeah? Not if I have anything to do with it! (And I do -- two words: Espio. Nodge.) That robot's not going to be overly producti... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    Geekologie Reader and Facebook fan Jasmine, who may or may not have forgotten her son's birthday until the day of, went and made a donut and dinosaur "cake" for the occasion. My God I want it. Right now I'm pretending the donut holes on sticks are actually sails and the whol... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    A 67-year old man backed his Mercedes (you're too old to drive!) through the wall of a parking garage on the 7th floor. That's higher than six! But nowhere near as high as my roommate (he just tried walking through the screen door again). 'The driver got his foot stuck under ... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    NOTE: Video is after the jump due to possible involvement of black magic. This is a couple year old video (my favorite kind!) of a helicopter flying around. Except the camera's speed is synced to the rotation of the copter's blade which makes the blade, get this, appear as if... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    This is an Ewok cake made using a teddy-bear shaped pan and a diabetic coma worth of icing. High-five, Wilford Brimley! (send those testing supplies right to my door) This is the birthday cake my Wife made for me this year. We have a teddy bear cake pan that hasn't been used... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    With a glorified vibrator from Newegg. Because nothing says, "thanks for everything, mom!" like a muffled buzz coming from your parents' room. Product Site Thanks to darwin police, who recently received a call from a woman's husband who claimed his wife had modified an elect... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    The bed ladder isn't what you use to climb into your roommate's bunk to cuddle at night. It's what you use to get out of bed if you're older than sin or disabled. The $15 ladder attaches to any bed (with posts or legs) and makes sitting up a breeze provided you have arm muscl... / Continue →
  • April 29, 2010
    I love candy, it's an important part of my life. Right up there with the internet and self-loathing. And this is a complicated Venn diagram that explains the relationships of different candybars to one another. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Put one of each in a blende... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    NOTE: Video is after the jump. You ever wanted to see a soft shelled turtle ride a Roomba? Me neither, but I did anyway. Needless to say, I wasn't surprised when the robotic d-bag kept ramming our reptilian brethren into chair legs and shit. Such a jerk. Which is exactly w... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    Technology, you know? It comes and goes so quick. One minute I'm stuffing 5¼" floppies into a Commodore 1541 disk drive to play Bounty Bob, the next I'm carrying around a lifetime of music on a stick smaller than the Naked Wizard's penis. Kidding! It's actually bigger, but ... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    Gary Katz went and made an Apple store diorama out of a shoebox, some construction paper, and a couple iPhones. "Why?" is the question I'm asking myself right now. And, "I have no f***ing idea, let's drink" is the only answer I've been able to come up with so far. Which, let... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    NOTE: Several more pics, five videos and a link to over 100 more pictures after the jump. I was going to type some words here but then I realized that would be a waste of my fingers, so I recommend you just go ahead and hit the jump. Unless your name is Luke, in which case I ... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    Forget starting a fire or setting up a tent, that's what matches and motels were made for, amirite? Now video games, that's what the Boy Scouts are all about. Except you can't actually earn a merit badge in video games, only a belt loop and pin. FLAIR I NEED MORE FLAIR. BE... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    The Ninja Slug is a newly discovered species of slug found in Borneo. I can only assume it wanted to be discovered BECAUSE YOU DON'T JUST RANDOMLY STUMBLE UPON NINJAS. Boasting a tail three times the length of its head, the newly described long-tailed slug is found only in th... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    David Morales Colón is a Puerto Rican man who passed away in a gun-related incident last week. And, instead of a traditional casket, is being displayed atop a motorcycle at his wake. Vroom vroom -- I'm comin' God! Yesterday and today, callers who stopped to pay their final ... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    This is a little city built by Peter Root entirely out of staples. Over 100,000 of them -- that's a tenth of a billion! Some would argue it's only a tenth of a million, but those people are wrong and wouldn't know math if it divided their ass in two. Hit the jump for a bun... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    This is a president Barack Obama action figure. Or, if you want to get technical, a "1/6 Scale Truetype Body - African American Advanced TTM-15". OMG, I THINK HE'S A TERMINATOR. Kidding, that's the governor model. *zing!* Granted we've already seen an Obama action figure be... / Continue →
  • April 28, 2010
    I didn't know ol' blue pants from Contra was named Bill. I swear, you learn something new everyday. Today I learned what it feels like to pick up a plastic bag full of soupy dog shit. Warm and traumatizing. Today's already a bad day aside, Super Mario Crossover is basically... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    Ladies rejoice, you can now own a replica of the piece of shit engagement ring Edward gives Stella in the Twilight series. Taste: Edward has none. Except for blood. See what I did there? Because he's a vampire! Last week, breathless fans of "The Twilight Saga" were treated... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    NOTE: Click HERE to see the graphic in all its gaming glory GLORY HALLELUUUUUJAH! Kotaku recently made a really cool informational graphic about the top 100 video games and what drives their characters to do what they do. This is it. We pulled the top 100 highest rated games... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    This is a picture of Leonard Nemoy performing the shocker (well, not literally) for the asshat sitting next to him. For those of you born post-Y2K, Leonard played Spock in the original Star Trek series. Also, WTF are you doing reading Geekologie? Teaser, Pleaser, Shocker, Sp... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    This is a video of an automated lawnmower. Well, technically this is a picture FROM a video of an automated lawnmower, so you're gonna have to hit the jump to actually see the thing in action. Anyway, to make your own auto-mower like the one in the picture from the video all ... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    The quadski is the lovechild of a jetski that humped a 4-wheeler despite Poseidon warning the watercraft that it would upset the balance of the oceans and the moon would probably come crashing down to earth. That must have been some good-ass sex, amirite?! The Quadski ($TBA) ... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    Master Chief, best known as the protagonist from 'Quake III Arena', is also an accomplished singer. And now he's got the CD set to prove it. Featuring such instant classics as 'One More Snipe', 'K-k-killing Spree' and 'I Can't Camp', the chief has something for everyone. Esp... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    NOTE: Full-res shot HERE if you're man enough. I was not. This is what a bunch of Pokémon characters would look like if they weren't designed to appear all friendly and lovable to children. Well I've got news for you, kiddies: REAL MONSTERS AREN'T CUTE. Real monsters are ... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    It's been awhile since Tokyoflash dropped a time-telling bomb on us, and frankly, I've been missing it. Just like your affection, EXCEPT YOUR AFFECTION OBVIOUSLY CAN'T TELL TIME (stop calling in the middle of the night, jerk!). Introducing the $168 Kisai 'Broke'. A striking ... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    This is Einstein, a 6-pound pinto stallion. I happen to love beans and horses, so he's a great combo. And smart (I have a dog named Einstein and he's a genius, plus rubs his rocket on my arm). Weighing in at just six pounds, the New Hampshire-born foal may be the world's sma... / Continue →
  • April 27, 2010
    NOTE: Click HERE to check out the interactive video. This is a screencap from a clickable and draggable 360º panorama of the old Cowboy's stadium demolition. From inside. THE CALL'S COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE! I thought it was pretty neat, but it would have been even nea... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    NOTE: Video is after the jump. Now drink some hot-ass tea and get ready to sing your face off, son! This is a video made for singing karaoke to 'Ewok Celebration' (aka 'Yub Nub)', made famous by everybody's favorite teddy bears at the end of Return of the Jedi. It's pretty h... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    These are instructions on how to make a Coke bottle cheat sheet. Admittedly it's pretty ingenious, but I don't promote cheating. I never cheated in school. If I wasn't prepared for a test I would fail the shit out of it with flying colors plus draw a couple penises. Sure I ... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    This is a series of experimental gummi bear surgeries. This is only one though, and not even the best, so you'll have to hit the jump to see them all. I particularly liked the heart transplant, brain transplant and dinoplasty. That reminds me: when I was a kid I used to brea... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    This is a chart comparing Kentucky Fried Chicken's new Double Down sandwich to other fast food offerings. So looking at the top of the chart, a Panera Chipotle Chicken sandwich is the equivalent of eating 1.49 Double Downs. But a Wendy's Triple Baconator is the equivalent of ... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    First off, what the hell kind of underwear are you wearing? It looks like a roll of gauze from the doctor's office. Which is to say, sexy. Don't act like you've never pleasured yourself to the anatomical chart on the door! Secondly: milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner w... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    Jordan Goldklang is a man. A man I like to call Jordan Goldwang: The Man With The Precious Peener. He hates it, but I can't help myself. And HE couldn't help himself from creating a magic major for himself at Indiana University. It was God's calling. No, no it wasn't. It ... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    I don't really keep up with movie news because that's IWatchStuff's job, but I did hear somebody's making a live-action version of the 'Lord of the Ring' series, so that's pretty exciting. I like turtles. But not this one, which is allegedly for the new Teenage Mutant Ninja T... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    Seen here possibly competing on 'Who Wants to be a Millionaire', renowned astrophysicist and genius Stephen Hawking is speaking out against alien contact. You know, because they'll kill us all. Seriously. Like with laserbeams and shit. Riiiiiiight. Lay off the Avatar, Stev... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    I don't care if you're a Trekkie or not, this USS Meaterprise looks delicious. Go on, admit it: you know you'd let it boldly go where no man several guys have gone before: Uranus. God that never gets old. Eat Up Trekkies! The Starship Enterprise Meat Sculpture [walyou] Than... / Continue →
  • April 26, 2010
    Okay, so maybe it's not actually Jesus. Maybe it's just the face of a hobo. Hey -- hobos have faces too you know. And you know what else they have? A stench that'll singe your nose hairs. But they don't have souls, which is why it's okay to nudge them with your car if they... / Continue →
  • April 25, 2010
    DeviantARTist Zoroko went and created this Zora Link costume for herself to wear to Ohayocon. It looks good. No -- great. No -- AMAZING. It almost makes me wish I knew how to sew. But it DOES make me wish I could have sex underwater without drowning (I never learned to swi... / Continue →
  • April 25, 2010
    Smell absorbing paint, affectionately known in the wall-covering industry as pigmented anti-toot film, absorbs odors yet remains shit-smell free. I swear, the future: we're living in it. Dutch Boy Refresh eliminates these volatile compounds, but goes one step further by incor... / Continue →
  • April 25, 2010
    NOTE: Jump video is after the jump. This is a two-minute time-lapse video of Geekologie Reader Joshua getting a steampunkish mechanical owl tattoo on his taint arm. The whole process took six hours, so basically you're watching at 180x. It kind of reminds me of Bubo from the... / Continue →